Daily I have been struggling with my thoughts of using again. At times they are really strong, telling me just go find some and than no problem. This has been going on for me for about a month now. I haven't replased yet and I say yet because I am desperatly holding on to my thread of sanity of recovery, I go to NA meetings, call my sponser and am working my step. I stay away from all I know who smoke. I am doing all that is suggested. I don't want to relapse. I am struggling and I know if I talk about it maybe, just maybe it will get better. I have been clean for almost a year again since my first replase. I want to get through this. I really do. Thank you all for who reads my words and gives me support, it means the word to me that all of you understand what I am goign through right now. Thank you.
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