Soooo....I've been clean for 5 months now and I am very happy with it. I feel so much better physically and emotionally. I feel healthy and strong. However, my spouse continues to smoke. He's not in my face or trying to get me to smoke or anything but it's there. He does it. I see his pipe on the dresser. I smell it. I don't crave it anymore. I don't really feel tempted. What I do feel is left out. It used to be our "thing". I was something that we did together and it was sort of bonding. Our relationship is already kind of crappy and this is just one more thing we DON'T have in common anymore. Anybody else going through this - a spouse who still uses? Is it unfair to expect them to stop with you? I ended up quitting after failing a UA at work and being sent to treatment. I did it to save my job and save my family (we need to pay bills and we have kids). I would have quit to support him in the same situation. Am I expecting too much?
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