this weekend was a disaster. i had gone 20 some odd days without even being around it. then friday came along and what happened? i caved i caved like a weak stupid girl. i feel so lost i tried so hard this time. i didnt stop at just one session i guess you could call it. i spent two full days throwing away everything. i just gave up, why? why did i? i have no idea because i figured just one hit wont hurt. one taste wont kill me...i was wrong. i punished myself today by running 3 miles and lifting till i almost threw up. hopefully that will make me more weary next time....but there wont be a next time i know it... i can do this.
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