I am a 29 year old single mother that has been working in healthcare since the age of 18. My father has been diagnosed with stage 4 adenocarcinoma, I have been named as his health care rep/power of attorney. I want to move him in with me due to the fact that he now has been wearing depends due to incontinence, can barely do anything for himself and I am trained in caring for people that can do absolutely nothing for themselves. The problem...I live 40 minutes from his doctors (and from the rest of my family). My family members have decided that it would be best for him to be up there close to the hospital where he receives his treatments. He will only be getting treatments for about 2 more weeks. I am gettin so frustrated because I get called on to "take a stand" as they put it when it comes to EVERYTHING that has to do with my dads healthcare, etc. I want him to be in my home, where I know that he will be properly cared for. The problem being that my family (who call on me to do EVERYTHING keep talking my dad out of moving in with me. My dad is still pretty coherent for the most part and can still make his own choices but my sister, brothers, and mother (whom divorced him when I was 10 years old) keep sticking there noses in and talking him into staying up there. My brother who is single and taking time off college to be up here close to dad until the end is already complaining because he has had to spend the night at the hospital....he plans to get an apartment and move my dad in with him. WHAT HAPPENS WHEN ITS 24/7 and not just overnight stays at the hospital??? I have a friend who has agreed to be on call if I need her to get my kids in case anything were to happen. My dad is a DNR he wants to be let go when it is his time so its not like we'd have to rush him to his hospital when his time comes. SO what do I do???? I am willing to care for my dad in EVERYWAY that he needs, but if he moves in with my brother I will be called on for everything as always!! I feel like I sound bitter for saying this, and I hope that no one takes it in a way that makes it seem like I am bothered by being called upon to help with my dad. But I just feel it would be better for him if he was with me. HELP!!!!!!
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