Loneliness Support Group

Loneliness is an emotional state in which a person experiences a powerful feeling of emptiness and isolation. Loneliness is more than the feeling of wanting company or wanting to do something with another person. Loneliness is a feeling of being cut off, disconnected and alienated from other people. The lonely person may find it difficult or even impossible to have any form of meaningful human contact. Lonely people often experience a subjective sense of inner emptiness or hollowness, with feelings of separation or isolation from the world... Why Do People Get Lonely? People can experience loneliness for many reasons, and many life events are associated with it. The lack of friendship relations during childhood and adolescence, or the...

6 Online
6 Online

Why do I feel disconnected from everything?

No matter where I am I feel disconnected from everyone around me. I feel that I don\'t belong. When I am around my family it is worse. I have felt this way for about 11 years and figured the isolation would go away. I try and remain positive when others are around but at times the isolation is hard too overcome. I have no one to talk to about this and was hoping to find some answers to why I feel so distant from my surroundings. The thing is I have no reason to feel this way, there have been no events that would cause me to feel lonely all the time. Anyone out there have any insight to this?

Replies

deleted_user
deleted_user

Have you tried talking to someone about your feelings? A friend or family member? Maybe the conversation itself will help you bond.
deleted_user
deleted_user

Everytime I have attempted to speak to my family about it, they think I am not being serious and brush me off. As for my friends they think I can't have any issues since they always see me in a positive state of mind. I tell them how I am feeling and they dismiss what I tell them.
deleted_user
deleted_user

Have you tried listening to your friends and family members? Asking them how their life is going? Sometimes to connect with someone you need to relate and sympathize with them first.
deleted_user
deleted_user

Sometimes I feel disconnected because I feel that I have nothing in common with the people around me. I raised in a very strict religious home in which I was taught the "norm" way of doing things was sinful and wrong. So, as I became an adult, I tried to change my thinking pattern because I wasnt raised in a very accepting home. I am very open minded but I think my ways are still that of how I was raised. I feel that I dont connect well with others because I wasnt exposed to a lot growing up. Just church and school.
17butterfly49
17butterfly49

Try not to be so hard on yourself. Attitude towards a situation goes a long way. Just approach people in a confident manner and don't worry about not fitting in. Be happy with who you are. :)
deleted_user
deleted_user

can relate directly to your experience self imposed exile robison crusoe syndrome.You get used to it till you eventually come to embrace it. The inner self, the tragic misery, life in a bubble you have to love it to love yourself face the fear like its a friend.
peterthegreat
peterthegreat

Maybe you can try online counseling.I feel depress when other people are around me.
deleted_user
deleted_user

Hey Javila8,
Quick question: Are you adopted? If not it's fine, but I am. And I feel exactly the same way you do. I get what you are saying with not fitting in. It's like you are trying so hard to fit in and belong, but no matter what you do you know it is not enough. Sorry if this is bringing up bad stuff for you, I did not intend for that to happen.

Back to the adopted question. I have a theory that adopted kids feel this way because of their adoption. Does that make sense? I'm not sure if I am right or just nuts, but either way I hope this has helped a little bit.
-R
deleted_user
deleted_user

My suggestion to you is to find yourself. It sounds like a piece in you is missing or is not being fulfilled. I know this because I feel the same way. I let a good man go because I felt he wasn`t fulfilling my needs. I know now it was me not fulfilling my needs.

There is always that one thing from your past that brings you where you are today. It may be little or it may be big. But it is causing you to feel disconnected. Figure out what it is. Until you do. I don`t think you can change how you feel.
deleted_user
deleted_user

RJE1987, I am not adopted, but what you said makes sense, I can not imagine what people that are adopted go though. When I am around my family I can't get comfortable around them, I know they love me but I still feel out of place when I am around them. When I do go home everyone is happy to see me and everyone wants me around them but again I know I don't belong. I have tried speaking to them but they don't take me seriously. As GoldfishCM suggested I have tried asking them about their lives.

Meha, I think you are right. A piece of me is missing, that maybe what is also causing my insomnia. I have a good idea of what is missing.
deleted_user
deleted_user

will you share?
deleted_user
deleted_user

When I was 20 and younger I was too shy to talk, I still retain some of this shyness but I talk more once I feel comfortable around people. When I was in the service I always volunteered to go overseas since I wanted to see the world and as a result I was never in a spot for long periods of time. Anytime I was getting into any sort of a relationship I volunteered to go overseas. Everyone I met never liked the fact that I traveled so much, and when I was back I worked 20+ hours doing both school and work full time. So my isolation my come from never being in a relationship, I hope that is not the case.

I should also note all my family members are married, same goes with my friends and co-workers.
deleted_user
deleted_user

Have you and are you avoiding relattionships?
deleted_user
deleted_user

I just got deployed a lot and everytime there was a mission to go overseas I asked to go. How often was I going to be offered to see Itlay, Germany, England, Dubai and various other places? But still how this effects the way I feel around my family puzzles me. I have not avoided relationships it is just I don't think many women would be accepting of having me bounce around the globe, which is partly why I got out of the service and turned down what the Army offered me. If my family did something to me than I could understand, just because I hardly spoke to them growing up should also no affect the disconnect I feel now.
deleted_user
deleted_user

I don`t know how old you were when you went into the service. If it was a younger age. I think I might know why you feel disconnected. You went in the service as a boy knowing only what was taught to you by your parents and only knowing the surroundings in which you lived.
You came home from the service a Man. You have seen the world; experienced and learned many new things. I am sure your wants, needs and values are different through your experiences from what you were taught as a boy..
You went into the service as one person and came out another. Your family still has the same beliefs and values and still sees you are the same person who went into the service. Their boy. And your not. Your a man with your own sets of beliefs and values. I think you feel disconnected because they don`t know you as the person you have become.
I don`t know if this makes sense to you. I have trouble putting into words what I want to say. I hope in some way this might help you to maybe figure out why you are feeling disconnected.
Please for give me if I have addressed you as being a man and you are a women. But my guess is you are a man.

Meha