Loneliness Support Group

Loneliness is an emotional state in which a person experiences a powerful feeling of emptiness and isolation. Loneliness is more than the feeling of wanting company or wanting to do something with another person. Loneliness is a feeling of being cut off, disconnected and alienated from other people. The lonely person may find it difficult or even impossible to have any...

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Loneliness and Holidays

Nickie1004
Nickie1004

Hello everyone, I hope that you are all doing well this weekend. Do any of you feel lonelier on a holiday like today, Father's Day??? My own father is not in my life and has not been for years. He is not well mentally and I choose not to have that kind of chaos in my life. Since many of us do not have many friends or none at all, and may not even have much family, some of us may feel lonelier on days where you are supposed to be with family and friends. I have other family that I am not close to, so the only people I deal with daily are my mom and son. While I am thankful for my mom and especially my son, I still feel lonely. I'm not comfortable speaking to my mom about certain things and my son is only 2; he is my child, not my BFF.


I knew that breaking up with my ex last year would cause me to feel more loneliness even though I was still lonely with him. I thought about calling him to see how he is doing, but he is still angry that I left him. I was just not willing to spend the rest of my life with a sociopath, so I had to walk away for my sanity, safety, and my own health. I think we all wish this feeling of loneliness did not exist, I know I do. No matter how many people you have in your life, you can still feel incredibly lonely. So every time I get lonelier and I want to contact my ex or someone else from my past, I remind myself of why I cut them out of my life to begin with. I remember that I deserve better and that I am worthy of being treated well, NOT being treated like trash in a landfill. I also remember that I have to be an example to my son. He is growing and developing and he does not need to see me with a revolving door of abusive bum losers. His safety and happiness are more important than my feelings!


So I just wanted to tell everyone to hang in there, it will get better eventually, but please remember to do what is best for you and your heart. Being miserable with someone to avoid being lonely or alone is just not worth it. I'll take being lonely over being in an unhealthy or dangerous situation with a POS any day of the week.



Happy Father's Day to all the amazing fathers out there!


God bless.


Leesha78
Leesha78
Thank You for a very nice post! Father’s Day in particular does not make me emotional, my father passed away when i was 13 but we were never close. But holidays in general do make me very lonely. I live with my mom but as you said it is not the same as friends. As an introvert as well as empath, too much socializing can be draining. Agree Also that it is not good to stay in a toxic relationship just to have someone. Thank You Again for a nice post
getfuzzy
getfuzzy
This will be my first father's day without my father...who passed away last fall. So the day will bring some sadness. On the other hand, I was blessed with a great dad who made a lot of sacrifices so that I could have a great childhood. So for father's day I will remember how much I loved him and miss him.
Nickie1004
Nickie1004
@Leesha78, thank you for the response and you're welcome for the post :). I also live with my mom and I'm introverted too. I rarely meet introverts like ourselves! Most people I've known are extroverted. Well, some studies have shown that most people are a bit introverted and extroverted, I guess I'm extroverted when I need to be :). I don't know, but sometimes I do feel lonelier on the holidays, I guess they just all remind me of being with family and friends. My mom has her own life and friends and I've always felt that she enjoyed being with her friends more, probably because she grew up and didn't feel much of a connection with her parents or brothers, so I get it. I just don't like having things thrown in my face and I don't like being around a bunch of people all the time.

But I just take it one day at a time though. The loneliness and depression can get to me, but I'm hanging in there. I do need a change though. I've been thinking about moving and just starting over somewhere but I don't want to move away again without a job, I did that before and the result was a lot of debt! Being lonely is very tough, but I'm just trying to get past it all and work on myself slowly but surely. Even when I do have other people in my life, I'm still lonely or in a toxic situation so I just cut out the toxic people and it does feel better but lonelier. Nothing I can do about that much I guess, I just don't want anyone in my life that doesn't really want to be there or that doesn't genuinely care about me. I don't want to have to settle for some bum out of the loneliness I feel, I did that for years and it only led to bad situations and heartache. I just don't want to go back to that life, so many bad relationship decisions and so much unhappiness. Anyway, I will be okay, at least I hope to be :). When I get really down and lonely, I think of my son, he needs me. He's my unexpected little miracle. Two and half years later and it's still a shock somewhat that I'm a mum :)!
Nickie1004
Nickie1004
@Getfuzzy, so sorry about your dad. You are so lucky to have been blessed with a wonderful father. I hope that you will cherish your memories with him. Father's Day makes me sad because so many children were abandoned by their fathers or both parents so they have to grow up with that pain. And there are adults like me that have no current relationship with their father, so that still brings some sadness for some too. I just hope and pray that people will become more responsible in their choices. If a person does not want children, then they need to do something about it to prevent it. But for someone to abandon a child for their own selfish needs is just disgusting and sick. Very, very sad.
peterthegreat
peterthegreat
Yes, holidays are depressing for many people. X' mas is the worst holidays for many people. They think more about sucide.
jannytheresa
jannytheresa
I am getting sick of holidays in general. The spring and summer are always hard with Memorial day, Mother's and Father's Day, July 4th, vacations, get togethers etc....the pressure is on to do something, go somewhere. I have been sick for a year and am crawling through these SPECIAL holidays.
While I am not a stick in the mud, I realize that the media gets things all jacked up and we end up
hyperfocusing on these days, buying gifts, cooking etc...I wish that these holidays were toned down. I guess that they can be if we and those around us choose to decrease of expectations and continue to take care of ourselves.
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