I don't know how to balance this whole separation thing. I work three jobs need the EX to watch children while I work. Get angry with him because I hate that I have to work so much while he isn't working because he is in construction and that industry dried up. I don't get help with bills but I have plenty of work and he is able to take care of the children while I work so I should be happy RIGHT? I want the divorce and I don't want to be with him anymore. He is a good person just not good for me. I landed myself in some awful situations lately and it totally isn't me but I just keep digging myself deeper. My three children are my everything but I don't get to spend much time with them due to working so much. I live in a small town and rumors have started flying about the one night situation I got myself in and I just don't know what to do. (the story has had lots of false details added to it) I did mess up one night and I totally admit it but where do I go from here. I am just so sad. I want to crawl under my covers and never come out. I think I am a jerk for putting my children through this whole mess but I just can't stay in a relationship that is unhealthy. My question is........How do you get through the small town rumors? A piece of the rumor is true but the rest is all made up and I am worried my children (14, 13, 11) are going to catch wind of it and that would be devastating.
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