I am a formerly married lesbian who has been in a relationship with a woman for two years. For the most part, I am extremely happy with my partner. She is a wonderful person, and we are very much in love. We have every intention of spending the rest of our lives together. The caveat is that she is dealing with a lot of guilt around leaving her marriage and not having her kids living with her (although they live very close). I am trying to be very supportive as I certainly went through a lot of guilt myself, but she exhausts herself trying to make up to her kids for the fact she left. In addition, she has one child (age 17) with behavior issues (is verbally abusive and has bordered on physical abuse and is just not very nice a lot of the time), and this really affects my partner. I get very "triggered" when I hear about a lot of the behavior, and we agreed that she should not talk to me so much about this one child. I grew up with a very physically and emotionally abusive/neglectful mother, and I have a real hard time with bullies. We do not spend as much time together as I would like, because of her kids, although I am a little limited because I have one child (age 16) living with me. I also have another child who is in college. I am doing my best to be very supportive and letting my partner work through her guilt on her own time, and she is making an effort to put more into our relationship after we had a argument around this issue. But, I still feel frustration. So, I joined this group with the hopes of talking to other lesbians who may be in similar situations and can offer perspective and support.
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