
Lesbian Relationship Challenges Support Group
This community is for those who are in a gay marriage, and the unique challenges that may be had in a same-sex relationship. Find support and talk to others in a same-sex marriage, and get advice from the experiences of other members.

deleted_user
My girlfriend and I have had a rough time with this relationship. We fighting over stupid things, i've broken up with her several times, but we still seen to end up back in each others arms. I know that i've had a couple of topics on here and what it all breaks down to is that she likes to control me and everything around me, its getting better because i'm not letting her have the control anymore. Anyway, the bad thing is that i am in love with her, which is the sad part. I've changed my whole world for her. I came out to my family including kids, and ex's, and all of my friends which got me into a rough custody battle for my sons. i've moved into my own place and i've even tried to look at her point of view on how i raise my kids. well, we've been together for 11 months now and i'm ready to move in/talk about our future together. When it comes to these subjects she reminds me of a man. Everytime I bring up moving in she has an excuse from not wanting to, even though she's there everyday and night, the excuses range from i have 4 kids, 2 ex-husbands, never been on my own, oh yell everyone needs to adjust. Anyway, last night i ask her why she doesn't talk about marriage and being my wife, again another excuse, she thru in my face that I haven't taken responcibilty for my pass marriages, that i just could have said "no", that's another story. There always seems to be an excuse not to talk about these things , our lives together, she says that she's going to spend the rest of her life with me and i'm the one. When i think about how she doesn't want to talk about moving in or me being my wife it reminds me of being with a man that totally avoid the subject because he's doesn't want that with you. I really need advice, should i take sometime away from her to think, maybe so she can think? i'm a women i want to plan these things especially since she's the first person that i've ever beein in love with and this is the first time taht i've ever wanted to marry someone and have given all of my heart to. I just can't figure out if she loves me and i'm the one why its so hard for her to move in or talk about being my wife, to make plans talk about our wedding??? Am i being a fool? Or is she just playing with my heart? Don't understand...
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peace, t
My partner and I was together for 12 years. 12 crazy, upside down, out of control, and totally you guys should not be together type things.
She was controlling with her love at first. And in the begining I didn't mind, because I was still in the first stages of love, Oh BABY WHAT EVER YOU WANT OR NEED. Lasted for about a year. Second stage of Love, I call it the What About me, this is my relationship too phase. She was totally taken by surprise, I dare I change the rules, you were not this way a year ago. We got through by her excepting my growth, and by me letting Iher control somethings, holding my tongue and I sure she held hers some too.
In between the second and third stages we had to do some parenting. Boy talk about two different view on that, we meet some where in the middle by mistake. But we got there.
Stage four we developed mutual respect, she had her likes and I had mine, but we both agreed that we loved each other more than we dislike the bad qualities in the other, those were rough times, seperations, bad break ups and everything, we learned the hard way, but it worked.
5th stage, uncontrollable lust for each other, her needs my needs, we made sure the needs were meet, again by accident.
I didn't to the 6th stage with her, she died.
All of things that happened by accident, just what was going on, talking and listening. Weighing how things would be without this person in my life.
Looking back I wouldn't change a thing, maybe just one, She would have live long enough for stage 6.
My partner and I was together for 12 years. 12 crazy, upside down, out of control, and totally you guys should not be together type things.
She was controlling with her love at first. And in the begining I didn't mind, because I was still in the first stages of love, Oh BABY WHAT EVER YOU WANT OR NEED. Lasted for about a year. Second stage of Love, I call it the What About me, this is my relationship too phase. She was totally taken by surprise, I dare I change the rules, you were not this way a year ago. We got through by her excepting my growth, and by me letting Iher control somethings, holding my tongue and I sure she held hers some too.
In between the second and third stages we had to do some parenting. Boy talk about two different view on that, we meet some where in the middle by mistake. But we got there.
Stage four we developed mutual respect, she had her likes and I had mine, but we both agreed that we loved each other more than we dislike the bad qualities in the other, those were rough times, seperations, bad break ups and everything, we learned the hard way, but it worked.
5th stage, uncontrollable lust for each other, her needs my needs, we made sure the needs were meet, again by accident.
I didn't to the 6th stage with her, she died.
All of things that happened by accident, just what was going on, talking and listening. Weighing how things would be without this person in my life.
Looking back I wouldn't change a thing, maybe just one, She would have live long enough for stage 6.
PS. She might want to be your husband! ;)