A woman calls the police to report her husband is missing.
The police arrive and ask for a description.
She tells them he's 6 foot 2 inches tall, blonde wavy hair and has a smile that makes everybody love him.
The police then go to the next door neighbor to verify this report and the woman next door tells the police,
"You can't believe her.
He's 5 foot 4 inches tall, has no hair and he wears a perpetual frown on his face."
The neighbor then goes and asks the woman why she gave the police such a false report.
She replies, "Just because I reported him missing, doesn't mean I wanted him back!"
Two little kids are in a hospital, lying on gurneys next to each other, outside the operating room.The first kid leans over and asks, "What are you in here for?"The second kid says, "I'm in here to get my tonsils out and I'm a little nervous."The first kid says, "You've got nothing to worry about.I had that done when I was four.hey put you to sleep, and when you wake up they give you lots of...
What's on the schedule? my son has requested help with a school assignment, so that is pencilled in for early afternoon. As for this morning, I thinkill shower and have a couple of eggs for breakfast then take dog to dog park for "3 loops", which is approx one hour walk. The leaves are so pretty this time of year. We had a curb side give away day yesterday but no one took my items. So I should...