I have been in an on and off relationship for 7 years with the man I love and hate. I am not sure if feeling that way is possible but that is how I feel. Every time we have broken up we have dated other people for a short period of time before we ended up getting back together. We love each other and most of our break ups were for silly reasons but some of them were for cheating. Which we are both guilty of. We blamed it on dating at a young age and being immature. We recently got back together and have been going steady for awhile now without breaking up. But I always find myself questioning how long until the next break up, is he happy, does he miss any of his ex girlfriends, is he being faithful etc... I hate feeling this way and he reassures me that he is happy, wants to be with me and is being faithful but I can't convince myself to believe it and it leads to me having anxiety. I compare myself to every girl he has dated before me and during our break ups and some times I feel like I am not even his type when it comes to certain things. My jealousy and insecurities have led to a lot of arguements. I am trying so hard to hide it from him now cause things seem to be going so well. But I needed to vent before I accidentally blurted out how I felt to him again...for the millionth time. I wish I was more secure and confident.
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