I cannot bear the gut pain any longer. When my gut pain was compared to others with IBS here, everyone told me my symptoms didn't really match. The gut pain spikes my BP to 185/115 & I end up in the ER. For the 3 bp meds I was given don't offset the pain....my gut pain over-rides the bp meds. I have low/normal bp when not in gut pain, so I'm not supposed to take BP meds daily, for it drops my BP too low. I've had numerous surgeries, 8 colonoscopies...and all that's been found are adhesions in the small bowel and a "very inflammed colon." Nobody is doing anything to help me....I'm merely given Vicodin for pain or Dilauded or Morphine. My gut, during an attack, grows 10x it's size, with little pouches sticking out....doctors freak out when they see me like this, but nobody does anything. My pain is out of this world and I can't walk upright during an attack, for I'm usu. curled up on the floor writhing in pain. I have no income due to my inability to work, am about to lose my house, and I have neck & back problems, with a tumor in my spine...and herniated discs in my neck and spine....due to a physical therapy accident in 2005. I don't qualify for disability because where I live, in CA, you must have all limbs chopped off and be comatose to receive benefits. I can no longer afford my pain meds, nor BP med, nor trips to the doctor. I have no family, no support...and emotionally, this is all working on me and creating so much stress...I'm only 46...and I've worked my whole life since I was 16....I had to quit working in 2001 and have burned thru all of my money. At this precise moment, I'm very, very depressed, and see no way out. Social Security views a house, a car & a cemetery plot as "assets" so that is their reason they won't qualify me for funds. I'm wishing right now, that I was dead, for I cannot bear this physical pain any longer, nor anything else. Sometimes I pray to God to end my suffering....and this is only the pain talking. Thank you.
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