Our D day is coming up next month and already things like Mothers Day are triggering me really bad. The past few months have been okay but lately I'm having more and more bad days. I feel like a split personality like I've gotten so good at pretending to be happy that I can usually hide the unhappy but lately it's getting harder. Today is Mothers Day, as usual hubby put little to no thought into it. I got a cd again. Last year I got a Taylor Swift cd from my kids which I ended up having to throw in the trash after I found out that while hubby was seeing OW, she brought in the same cd to share lyrics of songs that made her think of him. He cheated 6 days after our wedding anniversary so wed anniversary and cheating anniversary are both in June. My Dad and stem mom (who raised me) are flying in from NY in June and my husband and I will unfortunately be "celebrating" our 12 year wed anniversary and the other while they're here. They have no clue and absolutely can't find out. I feel like I'm turning into such a mess already that I don't know if I'll be able to function at that time. How did you all deal with it? Is it even possible not to be in tears the whole time? Already I can't wait for hubby to go to work so I can come in my room and cry and then compose myself and put on my game face for my kids.
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