Even if he's not having a physical affair, he's having some sort of emotional affair. What Grown involved man texts and calls another woman? Everyday!
A man with motive, and a hidden agenda, that he's not telling you about. He needs to decide what's more important to him, you or his little side fling. And you need to decide how much you are willing to take.

Oh honey. It's good you went to see a counselor. I find counseling really helpful. I've had those feelings too - like life is crumbling around me and I'm not strong enough. This site and counseling has helped me through a lot though. You don't have to deal with any of this alone.

He's cheating....he has issues....the question is...what should you do next?
Don't talk to him until you have a plan....because if part of your plan is trying to find out the truth about what is going on...then the less information he has the better.... do you have any idea of who the woman is? Is she a co-worker/ friend?
Does he stay away from home or go out after work? Would you consider following him? or have someone follow him after work to see where he goes? you should be able to get 6 months of back cell phone records... is there a pattern to the calls,texts? is it at a certain time of day-as if they are making plans?how long has this been going on as far as you know?
if you know who the OW is-do you know if she is married or in a relationship? I would contact her husband...and ask him what he knows...you could get alot of info that way...
The problem is-your husband is not admitting to anything...he sounds like he won't until you confront him with hard evidence-copies of emails, text measages , cell phone bills etc. He will try to make you the crazy one-there's even a word for that-its called gaslighting-after an old movie-called gaslight where the husband was cheating and wanted to drive his wife crazy so he could get the $$$.....
you can message me anytime....I hate to say it but after 10 months of this I feel like an expert on the subject- great- my new major is affairs 101!
But, counseling is great....as well as talking to people on DS.
You need information to know where you stand...and then a plan.

My affair began with texting. Go with your gut instincts.

My husband stuck to is story for years and would still be sticking to it if I wouldn't have found the legal paperwork he'd hidden forcing him to pay child support for the child he'd had with the other woman. I wish I would've trusted my gut but for years let myself be convinced that I was being "the paranoid bitch". Every situation is different but I think in general we need to trust our instincts more. I understand that desperation to believe the lies though because the alternative hurts so much. My heart goes out to you.

A few things about your post bothered me, wynd.

First off, you said what if it is only texting and calling? Isn't that enough? Does that make it easier for you? Probably not. Plus, and I hate to be the cynic here, but quite often where there is smoke, there is fire.

He will be by your side no matter what? A cop-out to excuse the fact that he is still in contact with the other. You need to give him the opportunity to back up his words by telling him to let the contact with the other die NOW.

The other thing that bothers me is when you said that him not being truthful makes you feel like you are the paranoid one. It bothers me that you are falling for the same trap that many of us have fallen for already. It upsets me to know that yet another person out there is made to feel guilty or question themselves in a situation like this - and that is bullcrap!

You say that there is contact "only" through texts and one call a day. The word "only" is put there by yourself and your bad feelings and I am sorry, has no weight behing that word. "Only" may imply once or twice, but that is one or two times too much.

And I hate to be the cynic again, but the "one" call may be just the one that you know about...

This guy needs to get his head out of his @$$. He is taking advantage of you and you are too nice about the situation.

If he really cares about you and will be there for you no matter what, then there is one way to find out for real. Tell him to cut her out entirely ASAP.

Whether he will be honest or not, whatever he decides, you owe it to yourself to call him on it. He is jerking you around, and it sounds like it is putting you through agony. I have a strong suspicion that you are better than that.

Call him on it. Tell him to make the right choice.

Good luck...

Okay, I have ben exactely where you are, text and phone calls are bad, but that IS only the tip of the iceberg. Just for the heck of it, what if he hasn't slept with her YET? You can't just let this go. He needs to stop ALL contact with her. If it is not physical, it is still an emotional connection. And most men don't make emotional connections. He has to be willing to stop all contact and go to counseling with you. Have you thought about contacting her? That is how I found out. You could also call her with him.
You are NOT crazy or paranoid, you are a wife and entitled to have a husband who does not talk to other women. Do not allow yourself to feel that you are wrong. Good luck...

ONLY CALLS HER ONCE A DAY?

WTF is that? He should not be calling any other women, except you, "once a day"

When I first found out that my H was calling his OW, I thought nothing of it. We were all friends...

Ya, I thought nothing of it.. all these years later... all theses years of begging him to stop "TALKING and TEXTING" her...

I know there was MORE to this than he wants to admit.

My H says "loves" me too, but continues to "talk" to her...ok.

If you feel betrayed, If you feel that there are secrets between them, If you feel that they share something that you are not part of..then he has cheated.
Maybe not physically, but emotionally.
Dont forget, YOU are supposed to be the most important person in his life!

Bring it up, if it is bothering you. Communication is the key, and sometimes men are not so good about that.

Men always lie when confronted. Rarely do they admit to anything. If your gut tells you something is wrong then you need to dig deeper!! Check out snoopbuddy.com and find someone nearby that is in the same boat to snoop for you