
Infidelity Support Group
Any relationship in which one partner engages willfully in sexual relations with another outside of the partnership is considered to have experienced infidelity. This breach of trust is often traumatizing for the faithful partner as well as the relationship, and support is often needed to heal emotionally and to decide whether or not the relationship should continue after...

deleted_user
So much has happened over the past year ! From the beginning she told me she didn't know his last name,& constantly lied to me about him not working with her,(she told me her fears about losing her job because of it),but all along she knew. I was so focused on finding him that I eventually did. Now I can ruin his life,if I choose to, but I keep asking myself how will that help me. I've been asking GOD to please take this vengence from my heart & help me forgive him & her so i can start to heal,(she'll lose her job too). All my wife wants to do is put this all behind us & move on, I'm stuck because of all the lies & the fact he still works there with her. I picked up a book called Change your mind & your life will follow, I've also been in therapy since it happened, but the book is amazing. I welcome all your thoughts & my prays are with all of you. Mickey
Posts You May Be Interested In
-
A friend sent this to me..As far as I can see, grief will never truly end.It may become softer overtime, more gentleand some days will feel sharp.But grief will last as long as Love does - ForeverIt's simply the way the absence of your loved onemanifests in your heart. A deep longing accompaniedby the deepest Love some days. The heavy fog mayreturn and the next day, it may recede.Once again, it's...
-
Today is my 25th birthday, to my somewhat lack of surprise I can see already no one really seems to care. I've always been the kinda person to make sure that everyone I Care about feels appreciated and knew somebody had their back. I can count 4 times this year when I Went out of my way to make sure a "friend" felt good on their birthday, especially if they got left hanging. Its early in the...
Forgive YOURSELF. You had NO PART in what SHE DID and you are NOT to blame. The rest will follow and the anger will disappear.
When someone you love does THIS to you, you feel that pretty much- whats it matter anymore. It does. Forgive YOU, and you will see how much your life matters. Take the high road.Its difficult and trust me, I have been there so many times.
It doesnt seem like the affair has been addressed either, from the sounds of your posts. Something has not been addressed. Whether or not it be that you have forgiven yourself, I don't know. BUt something has been left out to just dry up emotionally. What is it?
She needs to make a commitment to CHANGE, if not to you, or get out. I'd lay down the law and keep it there.
Anger festers when it is swept, and eventually you will look at your wife and ponder if you even love her anymore. If its at the point that you look at her and think those things, thank her when you leave her. Not meaning to sound rude,
but your wife is a real nutjob for letting this fester in you. She cheated, wrong decision number one. She carpet swept it- RECIPE FOR DESTRUCTION.
Frankly? Id leave her, but Im a bitch that way.
Right now, you have a clean heart and conscience. Keep it that way. Don't lower yourself to his level for the sake of a revenge that will NEVER be as sweet in reality as it is in your private thoughts. It could, in fact, backfire in ways you can't even imagine.
You have enough to work through just dealing with what has already happened. Don't compound your anguish by keeping tabs on this guy - he is SO NOT WORTH your energy. He doesn't deserve to have that kind of power over you, so don't give it up to him.
I know having the moral high ground in this situation is not much comfort, but it is a far better comfort than having to live with yourself if you stoop to his level and let him own even a fraction of your heart, feelings, self-control and power.
Focus on your marriage, which you DO still have. Don't drive yourself crazy thinking about THEM together - that is a dead end. Put your focus and energy into making THE TWO OF YOU together what you want and need it to be. As long as she is truly there in heart, mind, spirit and body - there is a way to get through all this.
I agree with the others, the forgiveness is for you not for them, You need to let go of the pain to free yourself from it!!
Dont know your situation but you two really need to talk about her getting a new job.
I too wanted to have vengence so bad and focused on it for weeks, But I will tell you it did get better after my wife was no longer working with the OG, And that freed me up to focus on letting go of the anger, I still have thoughts now and then but it's definatly getting better.