My husband and I have been married for what would be 5 years next month. During our marriage, he had a one night stand with my friend's sister and a 2.5 year affair with a coworker. He lost his job because of the affair and I found out because his mistress stalked and harassed me. My husband and I have been apart since January 1. I refused to see him until he told the truth about the one night stand and until he got a paternity test for the coworker's child. He came clean about the one night stand after several months of asking but did not get a test nor did he try to call her husband and explain why this child may be his and he needs to know. I have my husband until my birthday to produce. He didn't so I filed for divorce. I feel not knowing if he has a child with another woman is a nonnegotiable for me. I don't want to get divorced. He's begged me to come home and work on things but I flat out refused because of all of the lies he has told me and not knowing about the child. I love him. Logic tells me to run, emotions tell me to stay. I want so bad to work things out but why do I need to accommodate his needs to heal my wounds? I'm in a position now where we both have lawyers and neither one of us wants a divorce. I won't let the child issue go. He recently started seeing a neighbor which doesn't help at all because even if it did work, we would have to move. It feels like a slap in the face. I tried to see others as well and i know it hurt him too. My family hates him and my friends hate him. I feel so torn. I don't know what to do. I felt relieved for months when I was away from him but all of a sudden so sad, scared, and stuck. I can't let go but I can't stay. Help
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i have been married 8 years.what my husband does is joins dating groups,tells them he is single.texts them messages them,has been shut down from facebook,because of this.i have caught him, so many times.he has now got back his phone.i thought after tones of fights,and me telling him how this is cheat,he has started again....it hurts so much.i,m so faithful to him...i feel so lonely.
I haven't posted in a while. Recap: had a 4 month affair with coworker in fall of 2018. Husband found out in January of 2019. Have been working on marriage since. It didn't make sense for me to quit my job and I was able to maintain NC relatively well. However, was recently put in a new position (that I didn't want) which now makes NC more difficult. I will probably have to sit in on meetings 2-3...