Today is just going to be one of those days. I feel sick to my stomach...not the kind where you need to go to the bathroom, but the kind where you feel like there's no hope. Today is my counseling appointment with my husband...hopefully they can help us and maybe she will wake my husband up and put some common sense in his head. Ugh I am just so frustrated that I want to freaking die. But what's that going to solve? I woke up this morning and he just acts like nothing happened. He didn't even give me a kiss good morning or anything. I just feel like he's taking me for granted. He's the one who fucking cheated, why do I fee like the only one trying to make it work? Last night I lit some candles throughout the house because he had mentioned that he would like to come home to lit candles. But when he came home last night he sat down with me for a little bit, then went on the computer, I fell asleep on the couch and that was it. He said thanks but I didn't get the thanks I was looking for. He told me he can't take late night conversations anymore because it's stressing him out. Well does he realize that I don't like them either. I want some sympathy, compassion, and assurance. But I feel I'm not getting any of that. I just want to cry...I can't eat...I only try to eat something because I don't want to faint in front of my daughter. I lost lamost 30 lbs in 2 months and I don't even have to try. My heart is aching. When he's not in the same room with me I feel like he's doing something he's not supposed to or he's trying to avoid me because he can't stand being around me. What did I do to deserve this? F*CK I HATE MY LIFE RIGHT NOW!!!!
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