He didnt talk to her for over 2 weeks. We were doing really good. Then she has to send text begging him. She is emotional of course b/c of the baby. Like I give a damn about her emotions. So he responds to her "need". WTF??? And guess what she text back??? She thanks him for responding. It makes her feel like his arms are around her. Damn him and her. So now hes back to he doesnt trust me... you know I hurt him so bad for so long cuz I didnt listen when he needed me... the bitch that I am. So of course he loves me, but he just cant turn his back on her, she needs him. He doesnt love her, he loves me, but doesnt trust me??? Lets see.... it was less than a week ago hes telling me he want me to have his baby!!! And now I'm suppose to be doing all this prooving that I really do love him and want to be with him. Hes been hurt so bad, hes not moving hes standing still... he did all the begging and pleading for so long... he doesnt have any more left. I gotta do it all. Lets see... maybe I should just be his sex slave, since now he says thats all we got going for us, support him in his support of the B*****, never hurt, never question... you know I dont have that right.... let me just stand by him... but of course on his terms and that means at arms length every damn time she talks shit about me and he listens and "gives her what she needs". What the hell am I doing? Tells me I know what I need to do... start doing it...damn like I dont sit here 24 7 trying to figure out what to do to make it work. I think just by accepting the fact that he F***** her cuz I made him so unhappy and he felt unloved...and of course he tried to not let her seduce him...but poor thing was so hurt and unloved... just by even wanting to make our marriage work and accept the baby I think prooves that I love him! Hell last week hes planning on fighting for custody from her... this week hes planning on going up in January to "share in the sonogram experience". I should just tell him go to hell. God I wish I could. Some one just go ahead and lock me in the nut house... or just F****** shoot me and put me out of this hell!
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