How COULD You? You, the man I've loved more than anything, the man I said forever to, the man I was so in love with. Yes, YOU ...how could you? You know it will never be over for me. I have to deal with the effects every day of my life. My faith in you and in everything is destroyed! I choose to forgive you to the extent I can, I choose to plug on day after day trying to regain some of my self-esteem. I know that's up to me ...another thing that's up to me because of your selfish lustful actions! I still love you J*******. I don't know why I do, really. Yes, you've seemed sincere all the times you said you were sorry and that it was just a stupid mistake and that you don't love her like you told me you did. I'm sick of it coming up. I'm like a scared little girl everytime something happens and I feel threatened. I'm tired of being clingy. I'm tired of it all! I'm tired of how I feel inside. I want to be happy again!
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