
Infidelity Support Group
Any relationship in which one partner engages willfully in sexual relations with another outside of the partnership is considered to have experienced infidelity. This breach of trust is often traumatizing for the faithful partner as well as the relationship, and support is often needed to heal emotionally and to decide whether or not the relationship should continue after...

deleted_user
I'm a very private person but I need some support. I'm not sure if my husband is cheating or it's just all part of the job as he says. Most of the postings that I have read tell me to listen to my gut feeling/instincts..I guess this is what made me look through his emails/text messages. It made me sick doing this because I value my privacy and I was invading his...a lot of it was vague but never the less inappropriate. One in particular was some women he works with emailing him about her fantasies. He tried telling her that he loved his family and she replied that she loved hers and that this was just for fun and if she could email him with what she would enjoy doing to him. I noticed he deleted a lot of what she sent him but in one email she said that she was glad that he was enjoying it. I saw other women he had poked (all pretty)he says it's for work (music) but my question is why avoid her advances and yet poke others on line. There have been other obvious things like not answering his cell...not coming home when he's supposed to but I dismiss most of this because he is like this in general and not only to me. He tells me flirting is all part of the job and it's just the industry and that he wouldn't take it any further..then why all the secrecy, why even be inappropriate with anybody..help am i overreacting or am i on to something...
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The one thing that I know is inappropriate just by reading your post is that he shouldn't be talking to another woman via e-mail or any other way in a sexual manner. That IS cheating, even if they are just chatting about sexual things. Its very wrong because he is first of all hiding it from you and secondly he is talking about sexual things to a woman other than his wife. This makes it cheating. There doesn't have to be intimacy involved to make it cheating you know. He has crossed the line with this one woman in particular so that in itself would tell me that I couldn't trust him. He needs to earn his trust from you and he doesn't sound like he is doing that.
Flirting is NOT part of the job, hence why they have sexual harrassment laws in ALL states.
You are not overreacting. something is going on. Perhaps if he is in the PORN industry, flirting and email smut is "all just part of the industry" but I'm gonna take a big guess that your hub
is not in THAT type of industry, now is he? One more thing- I'd be confronting his coworker, big time.