
Infidelity Support Group
Any relationship in which one partner engages willfully in sexual relations with another outside of the partnership is considered to have experienced infidelity. This breach of trust is often traumatizing for the faithful partner as well as the relationship, and support is often needed to heal emotionally and to decide whether or not the relationship should continue after...

deleted_user
I am new to this site. I am trying to get some advice about my 15 yr marriage. I just found out that my husband has been having an affair with a married 20yr. She wants to leave her husband to be with mine. I found a message in November 06, he told me it was a wronge number. I believed him!! Then I found another message in March 07 and he said he called her back and Nov. to find out why she called him, they started talking and he went to meet her. He said he was sorry nothing happen. I believed him. Then he started coming home later and later. We started fighting about him never being home. Then on June 9, 07 I found pictures and text messages. HE told me they have been talking and they have meet 2 times and kissed and he felt her up. I was devastated. I cried and cried. He promised me he didn't have feellings for her and he was sorry. I prayed, we talked, I got self help books for us and it was a hard week. Then on June 14 he got another message and she was telling him she loved him, and she was calling him because he says she never calls him. I called her and she cussed me out. The next day she told me the whole ugly truth, they had been dating for almost a year. THey had been to several motels for sex. He had taken her and her son out many of times, this time I didn't cry. I confrunted him and he told me it was true. He said he tried to break off with her in Nov. but she said she was pregnet, then again in March but she said she would send me pictures. He had bought a phone for her to call. He didn't tell me about his raise so he could spend the money on her. He told me needed medication that why he never wanted sex. Then he promised he would never talk to her or see her, he called her infront of me and told her it was over. But then three days later he meet with her becuase she keep calling saying he needed to tell her to her face it was over.
I keep asking him how do I know, this time you are telling me the truth. He says because he has told me everything. When I asked him why he didn't tell me everything on June 9, 07 he said becuase He didn't think I could handle the truth. I belive I should forgive him, at the time he seemed so sincer. He said he never wanted to leave me. I asked him how he could do this and he told me it was when things were bad with us, we fougth daily, I didn't want him touching me (only becuase I thought he was having an affair, he said I gave him the idea!)
I don't want to be a fool again. I want to leave in peace and not worry about if he is being true or not!
Does anyone have advice.
I keep asking him how do I know, this time you are telling me the truth. He says because he has told me everything. When I asked him why he didn't tell me everything on June 9, 07 he said becuase He didn't think I could handle the truth. I belive I should forgive him, at the time he seemed so sincer. He said he never wanted to leave me. I asked him how he could do this and he told me it was when things were bad with us, we fougth daily, I didn't want him touching me (only becuase I thought he was having an affair, he said I gave him the idea!)
I don't want to be a fool again. I want to leave in peace and not worry about if he is being true or not!
Does anyone have advice.
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Can you believe someone who lied? Why did he lie? Why did he continue the affair after he was confronted with it?.
AND, why is he trying to shift the blame to you saying you gave him the idea?
Just a few thoughts that came to me, I am so sorry you are going thru this, I know how much it all hurts and I only wish you the best....
I'm about 8 months our from finding out and we're still together and I'm hopeful that we'll remain together, but not yet certain. It gets easier over time, but it takes 2 - 5 years to fully heal. Take good care of yourself - Kahli