It's been almost 2 years since his affairs and his new baby with one of the OW. He was doing so good at helping me to trust him again and work out our marriage. Two days ago I found him on his IM with yet another girl from a game we play together on the computer. He told her our personnal info. then went on to say he loves women, the way they smell, feel look, etc. You get the idea. When she didn't respond right away he was saying to her, don't leave me, well have a good rest, bla bla. When I confronted him with it he said it was a terrible slip. He was just having a conversation with her and it got out of hand, he's sorry, bla bla. Something in me has changed now, I'm not sure we are going to make it through this. My anger just causes him to give up and not try. I don't yell or scream or accuse, but he can feel it in my body language. I have no where to go, I can't even get into public housing. I don't even have any family I can go to. I'm spent, so hurt and angry. Waiting for things to spiral out of control again. Should be used to it but I don't think anyone ever gets used to that sort of thing. I wonder if God wants me to be alone, is that why my whole life with has been so horrible even though I try so hard to be what I should be for my man and my family. Where does someone like me go? I know my husband loves me but he can't seem to stay away from other women and I can't share him!
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I have been here before, a long long time ago and now I am back.Forgive me for not just saying what I want to say,even under a triple dose of antidepressants it is still raw and seeping and I am hesitant at revealing it as at least under the bandages around my heart I don,t have to look at how raw and wounded.My child was cleaved from my heart by his own actions. my child of ten,turning eleven...