I found out about my husbands affair 6mo. ago. We have been married 20yrs. I know I need to decide if we should try to work it out or seperate. He says he loves me and always has? States he "was going through something" midlife crisis ect.. I was the only person he every slept with ect.. I have heard all the excuses. He states it never felt right, but was concerned she would get upset and tell me about the affair. The affair lasted 4-6mo. in the last 2 months they had very little contact. Anyway I have been on this site almost daily, it does not seem that even the couples that are working hard on their marriages are very happy. Is that true? Always monitoring their spouse and such. I can not see my self doing that, or having the time to do that. I love my husband or else I would not be here, but I also trusted my husband. He has a job that allows him a lot of free time, and this is when this occured. I can not possible ever really know that he is not cheating, but I know now that he can not be trusted. He says he hates that he has done this to me and it will never happen again, he lost weight, does not do much, and is really trying. We went to counseling for a while, but it was not helping. Just last this week I asked to leave and almost had a nervous break down, and asked him stay? I am lost, do want to suffer always.
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