dont waste your time or anymore energy on her. you will only let her know she got to you. concentrate on your family

Write it all down. Journal it. Tell us how much you hate her. But, don't let her continue to run your life and ruin your holiday. You're giving her too much power over you. Write her a letter and put it in an envelope and put it aside for a few days. You probably won't want to send it. If you do, you'll only be bringing her back into your life again. She's gone. Let her be and find some other way to get it all out.

I know exactly how you feel. It was a year ago that my husbands affair was going on and I also have a hard time this time of year because I also feel that my holidays last year were a big lie. Or whatever he shared of himself during the holiday last year. The OW in my situation lives right around the corner. My advice to you is not to give her the satisfaction of letting her know that she is still in your thoughts. I agree with Oopss...don't let her to continue to ruin your life...I know it's so hard but just try to focus on your happiness and force her out of your head.

this time last year my H was also with the OW. I didn't know it until April but now that the holidays approach, I'm feeling quite resentful toward them both. She's long gone and even finally gave up and left the state. But I'm still angry inside and quite emotional. I sit back and think about last Christmas.. I was being played like a fool and I didn't even know it. All the supposed happiness.. It was false. Once again, he's ruined the holidays. My heart hurts for you. I know how you're feeling. Just hang in there. Write her a letter if you must. Then tie it to a balloon and let it go. She's scum, honey. She's worse than scum. You're better than that. *hugs*

I agree with the others, don't waste your time or energy on her - she isn't worth it - ESPECIALLY at this time of year. My holidays last year were also a big lie, and i must admit I have felt the same urges to want to contact her. Journal it honey and write that letter, but don't waste any real time on her - she definately isn't worth the stamp!!

i honestly cant give u any good advice since i too was just obsessed by her (little did i know there were many others)... i found out on halloween so thats always a difficult time for me although recently i just found out that the halloween after that incident he cheated on me again with yet another girl knowin damn well i was really stressed out about the year before. hey, he must have a thing for girls in costume, i dont know... but how i got over it was i left him.

ok here is what you do lil... open and compose a new email message or do a new word pad document.... write it all down everything you want to say to her...then save it..dont send it...

then every couple days look at it add to it if you need to ...or delte parts of it if you need to...keep doing this for a couple weeks to a month.. in a month look at it and if you decide you still feel that way and want to send it do so..

now a word of caution....if you are doing this to get any type of reaction from the ow don`t bother...also don`t put any threats or any slanderous comments in it as it can be used against you...

sometimes just writing it all down helps...if she knew he was married from the start nothing you can say to her will make a difference...I know what you mean about the holidays mine was with his slut last year also at this time and he even forgot about my bday because he was so involved with her...

I wish you the best and hope that you can enjoy your holidays this year as to me this is one of the best times of the year... Take Care of YOU

don't worry about here. Worry about you and your husband. If she's totally out of the picture, what is the worry? You will only run the risk of making things worse!

I wanted to also, I did a post here on the is site, and I was leaving it up to the replies I got if i was gonna contact her or not. My hausband said don't so of course I wanted to just because of that. Well I have NOT contacted her and really have lost the want to do so. Every now & then I would like to tell, ha, Lokk things are working and you aren't even missed. But I won't even do that she is so not worth it. I am happy knowing she is alone, nasty looking and just down right pathetic. I can walk over to the mirror and look at myself and feel good that I did everything I promised to do. I can look and she that I am not a homewrecker. DON'T DO IT!! Like reply #2 said write it down. It helps alot. GOOD LUCK

i say call and invite the bitch over tell her wot u think of her and how much damage she has caused and if she goes near ur husband again threaten her

Thanks for all th egreat advise, I knew it all along but I guess I nedded to hear it from others, I will let you all see it in my journal, she shouldn't know that I still have thought sof her, she is so not worth it. THANKS ALL.

I know how you feel. I MET the fat slug OW two weeks ago. Now I have a FACE to put on the other end of his C__K. Sometimes I wish I didn't know what she looks like, but other times I take satisfaction in knowing that I LOOK BETTER! WTF was HE thinking? My new year will be hard. We had a WONDERFUL time on New Year's Eve, two weeks ago I found a receipt showing when he took her to dinner or lunch (only 3 blocks from her house) on Jan 24..only three weeks later. I feel like my entire year was a lie too. He keeps saying not to cheapen the things we did together..but I feel he did something with me ONE day and HER the next. Yes..its cheap.

Hang in there..but I wouldn't contact her. She will get the satisfaction of knowing you still CARE OR you can RUB it in her face that you H dumped her ass.

I know how you feel. I MET the fat slug OW two weeks ago. Now I have a FACE to put on the other end of his C__K. Sometimes I wish I didn't know what she looks like, but other times I take satisfaction in knowing that I LOOK BETTER! WTF was HE thinking? My new year will be hard. We had a WONDERFUL time on New Year's Eve, two weeks ago I found a receipt showing when he took her to dinner or lunch (only 3 blocks from her house) on Jan 24..only three weeks later. I feel like my entire year was a lie too. He keeps saying not to cheapen the things we did together..but I feel he did something with me ONE day and HER the next. Yes..its cheap.

Hang in there..but I wouldn't contact her. She will get the satisfaction of knowing you still CARE OR you can RUB it in her face that you H dumped her ass.

I dont blame you and I think you should go ahead and do what you feel like: you deserve it. Also I dont get how some of you can be cheated on an then stay with your husband- if it were me he'd probably be dead, but thats just me. anyway, about the other woman- Id probably beat the shit out of her- Face it- that's all you want for Christmas - and Santa thinks youve been a good girl this year :)

My holidays to where a lie, and like you I want to pick up the phone, go to her house and tell her that I hate her. However, I also need to remember that I can get in trouble. She can call the police, tell them she feels threatened. Any letters we write, calls we make to them, can only ruin ourlives more. The OW has already handed our spouse the knife to put in our backs we can not let the OW twist it in any further. In some states we can file an allienation of affection lawsuit. In every state the file assualt charges (even if you through something and it accidently hits them, or the female favorite a slap across the face) and in every state they can claim harresment. Then again we can also do the same. Learn your state laws on what you can get arrested for, even if the convication never goes through.