Infidelity Support Group
Any relationship in which one partner engages willfully in sexual relations with another outside of the partnership is considered to have experienced infidelity. This breach of trust is often traumatizing for the faithful partner as well as the relationship, and support is often needed to heal emotionally and to decide whether or not the relationship should continue after...
I hate what my ex has taken away from me. She can have the money, she can have the house, she can have anything of any value, but can I have one thing back, just one fucking thing!!! My self respect.
Can I ever get an answer to the questions that run through my mind 24 hours a day, every day. Why wasn't I good enough for her? Why was this guy that that she didn't even know so much better than me. Am I really that ugly to her? Was the pretty face worth betraying all the late night talks, all the warm embraces, all the tender moments? Was it more special than all the nights I sat up taking care of her while she was sick? Was I so hard to look at that you couldn't bear sleeping with me anymore?
I don't know if anyone can love me. I gave everything to her. Everything I had to give. It wasn't worth shit to her. Why would it be worth anymore to anyone else? If I was so easy to discard, without a second thought, why would someone else want the scraps you left behind?
Am I ever going to be able to walk by a mirror without shuttering. Will I ever be able to look at myself without thinking what made me so ugly to you? What couldn't you get by? Was it my scars? My eyes? My teeth? My weight? What could I have done to make you love me? What can I do to make anyone love me? Will I ever be whole again? Will Iever be able to make myself smile again?
Why can't I ever stop feeling the pain?
Can I ever get an answer to the questions that run through my mind 24 hours a day, every day. Why wasn't I good enough for her? Why was this guy that that she didn't even know so much better than me. Am I really that ugly to her? Was the pretty face worth betraying all the late night talks, all the warm embraces, all the tender moments? Was it more special than all the nights I sat up taking care of her while she was sick? Was I so hard to look at that you couldn't bear sleeping with me anymore?
I don't know if anyone can love me. I gave everything to her. Everything I had to give. It wasn't worth shit to her. Why would it be worth anymore to anyone else? If I was so easy to discard, without a second thought, why would someone else want the scraps you left behind?
Am I ever going to be able to walk by a mirror without shuttering. Will I ever be able to look at myself without thinking what made me so ugly to you? What couldn't you get by? Was it my scars? My eyes? My teeth? My weight? What could I have done to make you love me? What can I do to make anyone love me? Will I ever be whole again? Will Iever be able to make myself smile again?
Why can't I ever stop feeling the pain?
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A friend sent this to me..As far as I can see, grief will never truly end.It may become softer overtime, more gentleand some days will feel sharp.But grief will last as long as Love does - ForeverIt's simply the way the absence of your loved onemanifests in your heart. A deep longing accompaniedby the deepest Love some days. The heavy fog mayreturn and the next day, it may recede.Once again, it's...
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I have my maxed amount of epidural shots of my cervical DDD....(and no one cares about my lumbar DDD)..... I've done physical therapy, muscle relaxers, Amitriptyline, Nortryptiline, desipramine.....narcotics... So I decided to go to a spine specialist and they have me on Gabapentin. Its been two weeks and it did nothing for my lumbar ever... but it did seem to help my cervical and arm/hand pain...
Look at wat you said closely. You gave all but it wasn't worth anything to HER! That tells you mountains of info. SHE refused the gift of your being and love-the world and everyone else HAS NOT refused that gift. And it is too precious a gift to let be destroyed because of this one person.
YOu asked why you cant stop feeling the pain- well, because right now you are hurtin-its a pat answer but imagine if you broke your arm-you're going to be hurting for a while-you ncant shut it off. Thats how the body is-wel the same thing happens with emotional pain. You HAVE to feel it-it is natural and normal and sometimes it is going ot be worse and other times better. But, like the broken arm-it will get better-it will heal and then it wont be broken but the bruises will still be there, and then the brusies will fade but it will still itch and not be as storng as it was before, and then the strength will come back and you'll discover it is even stronger.
You're never going to be the same as you were before-but you will be whole again.
Excelsior!
W
she isn't worth your love and affection. Did you just find out about the cheating? That is how I felt right after and couldn't snap out of it. Now...I still feel less worthy of love, but I don't think he is worthy of me anymore.
My husband is the SNAKE in Junge Book, "Trust in Me" He could sell Ice to Eskiomos.....I hate him for that.
What hurts I think for all of us here is that we love(d) our spouce and it hurts.
I will never be the same.
I went through the same feelings when I first found out my wife was cheating on me. "What did I do wrong", "Where did I fail", "How did I let her down" - you know, sometimes the problem isn't YOUR FAULT.
It's ironic to me that we always hear about the husbands and BFs who cheat, and the pain it causes, but we don't hear much about the men whose wives and GFs cheated - the pain is the same, the resulting problems are the same. My question is; "Who are all these cheating men cheating with?"
My first wife was divorced and had three young kids. I married her, took her kids as my own. I worked two full-time jobs to get the bills paid. Her kids called me "Daddy". She cheated on me several times, and I tried to figure out what MY problem was!!!
My suggestion here is that you take the time to be honest with yourself about what was right/wrong with your relationship. Learn from the mistakes, don't make those mistakes again. GROW and move on. It's not all your fault, and you WILL FIND HAPPINESS further down the road! Take care, and I hope this helps. Pete
I know in my heart I loved fully and without reservation and the fact that it wasn't enough is not our fault. We may have to say that over and over again for a long time before we believe it.
My husband said part of the reason he cheated was because of my weight. Didn't matter that he didn't look so hot either and that my heart was still the same as it ever was. That is what you have to remind yourself. Don't let her dictate to you what you know about yourself as a person. She is just one person who is caught up with herself right now
Believe in yourself and stand with your head up! You will make it thru this and you will be o.k. We are here for you if you need us!
Thank You All
Bill
As was said earlier, I'm not perfect. I am not much to look at. I am 32 and I know who I am, but so did she when she married me. I haven't gotten fatter or anything, I haven't aged all that much. It has to be her problem. But that doesn't make all of what she said about me untrue.
I forgot my original point. What does it say about me that the thing that goes through my mind the most is that she is happy with this other guy. I wanted her to be miserable. I wanted her to pine over me. Now that she has started to contact me again, I just want her to leave me alone. Let me heal. Hasn't she done enough to me. What more is there left of me to take. I am hollow. I am finally filling up that empty space, and now she wants to drain me again.
It's almost like she has this evil Jedi like bitch power that allows her to sense when I have any bit of happiness. Then it becomes number one on her to do list to hurt me a little more. She mailed me nude pictures last week. What the fuck was that all about?
Ok, I guess this is getting a little long, but I will check in regularly and reply personally and on the board.
Bill