I am sure to forget from time to time, but for now...I finally get it!!! I get that it's not about me, I get that my H is a master manipulator at making it appear to be all my fault, I get that the information once in my head is now in my heart, I get that his issues were issues long before I came into the picture, I get that it IS HIM AND NOT ME!!! I get that sure I have many issues to look at in my own soul, but I also get that HE DOES TOO! I get that my accountability is to my God, SO IS HIS!! Not to me, not to his addiction, not to his accountability group of other struggling men!!! I get the complexity of this situation is more complex than ever imagined! And most importantly I GET that I DON'T "GET IT" all! But over time, I "get" a little more peace, serenity, comfort, and confidence in myself that HOLY CRAP...there isn't a DARN thing I could EVER do to change him EVER, NEVER, EVER---AND it's TOTALLY NOT ABOUT ME! DAMN what a freakin relief!
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