About a year and a half ago my husband had an affair. I found out about it by looking at his phone records and the text messages that he got on his phone. That was in November, he was still in contact with this girl through the following February. Things did eventually end. We both wanted to work things out but we never really talked about what happened. He bascially told me to decide if I could get over it or not and move on. Then the following October I found, by looking at a credit card statement, that he was a member of a singles website. Again, he wouldn't tell me why he did it and told me to get over it. Now, two weeks ago we got into a fight and it came out that he has been questioning for the past 2 years whether or not we should be married. He has been staying at a hotel off and on and sleeping on the couch when he does stay home. Things are so tense at home that I can hardly handle it. We started counseling this week, to hopefully help repair all of the damage that we have caused. I am trying really hard to be patient while he decides if we are right together. My question is, how do you get through the day with so much anger, resentment and paranoia??? I feel like it's all I can think of. I have so much on my mind and feel like I have no control over anything. How do you get through that?
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