Infidelity Support Group
Any relationship in which one partner engages willfully in sexual relations with another outside of the partnership is considered to have experienced infidelity. This breach of trust is often traumatizing for the faithful partner as well as the relationship, and support is often needed to heal emotionally and to decide whether or not the relationship should continue after...
I cheated on my spouse. He knows about it and knew about it when I was seeing the other man. We've been doing great until recently. I noticed the last few months that every now and then, maybe once every 2-3 weeks that I see the OM's work phone number on our business caller ID. The only reason he can call me is that he figured out my business number near the end of our affair, otherwise, he would have no way of knowing where I am or where I work.
Anyway, Thursday I noticed the OM's work number on my caller ID and I answered it totally prepared to tell him to F off. Well he hung up on me when I answered. I REFUSE to give in to him and call him so I let it go.
So yesterday my husband and I are working together at the computer and the phone rings and it's an unknown number and I pick it up and its the OM. This is the first time in over 9 months that I've heard his voice. He asked if I was me and said hey to me all jovial like no time had passed. My first response was to immediately hang up the phone so I did just that. I then turned to my husband and told him who it was. He didn't get upset at that time. I reassured him I have not seen this man or made contact with him since the last time over 9 months ago. I even went to great lengths to send the OM a telegram at his work place telling him to leave me alone earlier this year. He still called and hung up on me at work for the past few months.
This morning my husband wakes me up very angry and accuses me of sleeping with this man again. I have not heard from this man or had any contact with him nor do I want contact with the sleazeball. We've talked and my husband seems to believe me now but it pisses me off that this OM won't stop calling me.
I refuse to call and talk to the OM. That doesn't work obviously since it hasn't so far. My husband said since he is calling me and hanging up from his work phone that I could call them and talk to management. This man works at a very famous retail grocer. My husband also said he is not going to talk to him. He said he will hurt him if he has to go anywhere near him and I don't want that.
I don't want this to continue. I don't want to talk to the man to tell him I want him to leave me alone because I've done this repeatedly and he keeps calling and hanging up. It's not like he's harrassing me since he doesn't know where I live. He just has our work number and it's not connected to an address through the phone company so it's not possible for him to find us. I'm not worried about that.
I think this man is just fixated and thinks I will go back with him. I mean I did cheat while married already so I guess he figures I'd do it again since I did it once. But I won't. I know I won't and I have no desire to ever do it again. I still live with the guilt of what I did the first time and will repay my husband for the rest of my life and after I die I will have God to answer to. And that's the hardest to deal with at this point.
I'm not looking for sympathy. I just want advice on what I should do. Should I keep ignoring the dumba$$ and hang up if he calls and I happen to answer? Should I send another letter or telegram (which I do not want to do)? Should I contact his boss? I even thought about calling his wife at her work since I know where she works but that would open up a whole other can of worms and I just don't care. I'm exhausted and I don't care. I have no feelings for this man, never did. He has a wife and kids. Why doesn't he just move on and leave me alone? I just don't get it. He knew my husband knew about him while I was seeing him so it's not like I'm ever leaving my husband for him. I wouldn't anyway, even if my husband didn't know about him.
Anyway, Thursday I noticed the OM's work number on my caller ID and I answered it totally prepared to tell him to F off. Well he hung up on me when I answered. I REFUSE to give in to him and call him so I let it go.
So yesterday my husband and I are working together at the computer and the phone rings and it's an unknown number and I pick it up and its the OM. This is the first time in over 9 months that I've heard his voice. He asked if I was me and said hey to me all jovial like no time had passed. My first response was to immediately hang up the phone so I did just that. I then turned to my husband and told him who it was. He didn't get upset at that time. I reassured him I have not seen this man or made contact with him since the last time over 9 months ago. I even went to great lengths to send the OM a telegram at his work place telling him to leave me alone earlier this year. He still called and hung up on me at work for the past few months.
This morning my husband wakes me up very angry and accuses me of sleeping with this man again. I have not heard from this man or had any contact with him nor do I want contact with the sleazeball. We've talked and my husband seems to believe me now but it pisses me off that this OM won't stop calling me.
I refuse to call and talk to the OM. That doesn't work obviously since it hasn't so far. My husband said since he is calling me and hanging up from his work phone that I could call them and talk to management. This man works at a very famous retail grocer. My husband also said he is not going to talk to him. He said he will hurt him if he has to go anywhere near him and I don't want that.
I don't want this to continue. I don't want to talk to the man to tell him I want him to leave me alone because I've done this repeatedly and he keeps calling and hanging up. It's not like he's harrassing me since he doesn't know where I live. He just has our work number and it's not connected to an address through the phone company so it's not possible for him to find us. I'm not worried about that.
I think this man is just fixated and thinks I will go back with him. I mean I did cheat while married already so I guess he figures I'd do it again since I did it once. But I won't. I know I won't and I have no desire to ever do it again. I still live with the guilt of what I did the first time and will repay my husband for the rest of my life and after I die I will have God to answer to. And that's the hardest to deal with at this point.
I'm not looking for sympathy. I just want advice on what I should do. Should I keep ignoring the dumba$$ and hang up if he calls and I happen to answer? Should I send another letter or telegram (which I do not want to do)? Should I contact his boss? I even thought about calling his wife at her work since I know where she works but that would open up a whole other can of worms and I just don't care. I'm exhausted and I don't care. I have no feelings for this man, never did. He has a wife and kids. Why doesn't he just move on and leave me alone? I just don't get it. He knew my husband knew about him while I was seeing him so it's not like I'm ever leaving my husband for him. I wouldn't anyway, even if my husband didn't know about him.
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theatre and I are there already. I'm having a very berry tea with crackers, cheese and cherry tomatoes and she's having a joint with some beer and we're both on really comfy recliners on thick pile carpet. we need some help with the decor if anyone is around??
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I'm trying to exercise daily. I was doing fairly well until I sprained my ankle 2 weeks ago but now I'm getting back on the horse. Today I walked over a mile with my arm weights that are about 22lbs total. I was out of shape and it was hard on my arms. I also did my 30 situps. I'm also going to drink a lot of water and try to eat healthy. I do tend to have a sweet tooth but I'm cutting...
the ow now and then still calls here and I deal with her on the phone you might want to let your H talk to him
I don't want to call the OM because I know how that goes. He won't take me serious no matter what I say or how I say it. He is used to being in a marriage with a woman that curses him and beats him and he goes back to her. So no good will that do if I curse at him and tell him to leave me alone.
Like I said, he has only called and hung up the phone on me for the last few months and its been very sporadic. It just took me completely by surprise that he called and asked for me when I picked up the phone that day!! It totally took me by surprise because I was not expecting it since I've had nothing to do with this guy in any way, shape or form.
And to whoever asked if the OMs wife knew about me, YES she knew about me. In fact, the OM lied to me about his whole life, had told me they were separated and his kids were being molested by his wifes new boyfriend, blah, blah. Then later on I found out that it was all lies and when I broke tried to break it off with him the first time (last year) he had his wife call me and bless me out and said I was crazy because he was a wonderful man and I was losing out!! lol! Seriously? Why would his wife call and tell me that I'm missing out on a great man if she is his wife!! lol. What a sick person he (and his wife) are in my opinion. They are both psycho in my book.