I'm 26, I was married for 3 years(together for 7), I thought he was my soul mate and could not imagine my life without him. We hit this point in our marriage which seemed rocky at the time but when I think about it, it wasn't. He has lost his job and slowly started to slip away from me. I would explain to him how I felt he was becoming distant from me and asked him what I could do to help. We became so distant and I wanted more attention from him. He thought we didn't have a problem and and I disagreed. I started going out more with my friends and one night met someone. We kissed that night and slowly started chatting online. Then one night the other guy and I actually went out and I did the one thing I said I would never do. My ex husband started becoming suspicious because I would stay out late at night and not come home until 6 in the morning. Finally he found out and was completely heart broken and devastated. After out separation I was so embarrassed about what I did, I didn't think about his feeling or how I hurt him. I didn't try to work it our and convinced myself I wanted to be single, I could do all this by myself, and so on. I saw the other guy once after that and couldn't see him anymore. I jumped right into a relationship with another person and it was so hard to make that work while going through a divorce. I'm finally single trying to figure out who I am and why I destroyed my marriage. My ex husband was a great guy who was truly one in a million and I threw it away because times got tough and I couldn't hack it. It's too late to make anything work, he has completely moved on with someone else and I'm happy for him but at the same time completely jealous. I haven't seen him in a year or talked to him in almost a year. His family and friends hate me and I don't blame them. I just don't know how to get through this anymore. All I keep thinking about is how much I hurt him and can't get the picture of his face out of my head when he found out. I miss him, my ex-in laws, and our dog. So my question is, how do I get through this and will the pain ever go away. It effects me in so many ways, school, work, friends and so on.
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