It has been 2 years since I found out about my husband's affair. I was the one who did the detective work and stopped it. (That still burns inside.) We have since done almost everything we can to repair our marriage and move on. He is doing all the right things, which I still struggle with. I want to make things work too, but will never truly trust him again. I was played for such a fool, I don't want to let it happen again. Anyway..I DO love him, but in the same breath...I hate him too. I try to squelch the hate for him, but it is always there in some capaciy. I ask myself ...am I wasting time with a man that I both love and hate at the same time? Can I ever truly love him with my whole heart again? I don't want to start over with someone else. I try to envision life without my husband and it makes me sad. I am just sad and confused as to how long I can live loving and hating a man at the same time. Anyone else who is working it out with their spouse feel the same way? Is this "feeling" grounds for calling it quits? How do you ever stop hating them?
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