I'm affraid this is a bit of a long one!! I shall try and keep it short. My husband has been acting strangly for about 2 years now drinking more and spending more time out then ever before. I had been putting this down to work stress and the death of a releative. Back in 2005 my husband anounced that he was feeling confused and wanted to spend some time apart so he stayed with a friend for a few nights and at a hotel for another couple of nights, he returned after a week and said he loved me and it was just work stress that was getting him down and the fact that i wasn't always supportive enough within the business (at this point i had 2 under 5 at home to care for and was doing accounts and payrole for him) Anyway he came home and things seemed fine in aug 2005 a couple of months later he came home and told me that (we'll call her ms x) ms x(the co-owner of the company we rented our office from who also had an office in the same block with her husband) had gone home and declared her love for him, he told me there was nothing too it apart from a good friendship and she was obviously crazy. I trusted him and thought nothing more of it. Anyway in 2006 i feel pregnant with our 3 child, he drank alot durring this pregnancy and on a number of occasions didn't come home until the early hours, this began to raise my suspitions. i started checking his phone and found messaged from various girls who i hadn't heard of which although weren't dirty or suggestive seemed rather friendly ending with xx when i questioned him about these he always seemed to have a fairly plausable excuse (he then put a key lock on his phone!) I managed to hack into one of his email accounts (which was quite a feat considering how secretive he is over his laptop!) I found an old mess from aug 2005 in his saved drafts to ms x saying 'i take it from your text it's over, i love you and want you for life, please don't end it like this.' I also found some smutty emails to another girl with dirty photos attached. I confronted him about this and his explaination for his email to ms x was that is was just a really close friendship that got confused and he swears that there was nothing physical. His explaination for the smutty emails was that it was just a bit of email fun and that all men do it to some degree. I contacted the girl concerened and she also swears blind that it was just email and text fun and that she regrets it. Under some duress he has admitted that there were other girls he had webcam fun with. He swears that he loves me to bits and that it all meant nothing, he promises he will never do anything on the internet again he has also been a model husband htis last few months since it all came to light. My question is.. Is this cheating? Should i forgive him? and can he be trusted? Please help me i am so confused and must do the best for me a my girls.
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