There is alot of anger, and I want to tell everyone about an experiance I had. My husband and I were arguing one night about the affair, and I slapped him across the face, I walked out the door to calm down, and when I walked back in the house he had called the police. Though he made it very clear to the police he did not want to press charges, and only wanted it documented the police had no choice but to arrest me, and the state pressed charges. Domestic violence is very broad category, it applies to spouses, partners, boyfriends, girlfriends and any family member. When it comes to pressing charges the states now press the charges even if the victim says no. This was done to protect people who are abused and never do anything. Harresment according tp most states applies to following, viewing antoher persons "personal items" such as cell phone bills, computer documents, opening mail etc.. I ended up being out of my house for six weeks and was kept from my daughter for a week, and could not go back to the house for six weeks. This was not at my husbands request, part of a standard bail agreement is that you have no contact with the victim, we had to go to court to get permission to talk while it was being sorted through so that we could make arrangements for my daughter to be with me. My husband and I are still trying to work through this and I am home. I am also required to take "anger maangement" classes. There are woman in the class who did things such as throw their boyfriends clothes out a window (this is considered destruction of property). One woman called the OW and the the OW claimed that she was threatned.
I know we are angry, and I know we all feel we have some right to do those things that as woman we have always said is ok for us (throwing plates, making calls, and the only violent action taken we are known to take a slap across the face (and no my husband had no marks)) But it is agains the law, and it is the state the presses charges to take it out of the victims hands. So please learn your state laws if you are really intent on doing something, don't destroy your life anymore than the OW and your partner has. If there are kids involved you will be giving your spouse ammunitaion to keep the kids, and when you get divorced they have an upper hand because you were arrested for assualt or harresment. So please learn from my mistake.