I have been with my husband for 15 years and married for 2. we have 3 teenage children, two from my late husband and one together. We have always had a difficult relationship with many ups and downs. Last year I found out he had been having an affair and as time went on I found out about other one night stands. we had no sex life as I had lost all my sex drive and respect for him as he was so unreliable on a day to day basis. we were both at fault. The affair was a massive shock and we realised we still loved each other very much and have worked hard to save our marriage. I cannot fault my husband in the way he as supported me over the last year as i just fell to pieces and i know he seriously regrets his actions. But now, one year on I am just not getting over it. The worst part is that I had quite a good social life before and I'm a musician and loved going to local music sessions to play, plus lots of other local things. But everytime I go into my local town, just say to shop, I bump into her. She goes to all the same places and was part (roughly) of the same circles. I can't bear it when I see her, I just break down and all my old insecurities come rushing back. Its hard to avoid as I live very rurally, I can't afford to move and my children love it here. I feel like she (& husband) has ruined every part of my life, I feel crap about myself, my attractiveness, feeling boring, dont see friends anymore etc. Feel like running away. Often in bed asleep for the relief. I know i should be over it. what do i do? how do i get my life back? He has told me so many lies to 'protect' me I don't know what to believe. is there ANYONE out there who has been through all this and come out of the other side? If so how????
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