Hi I’m new here, and I really needed to speak to people outside of my family and friends that can maybe help me see perspective from another point.
My husband had an affair with an ex of his. He always told me she broke his heart and he couldn’t stand her. We’ve been together just over 6 years when the affair happened. He told me he was going to a concert with the guys and didn’t come home. I became a super detective when I awoke and found his location and went their to confront him! Apparently a mutual friend of theirs had passed recently and they re connected at the funeral. The Affair continued from there another month I found out this a few months later Into trying to make things work l! I was distraught he was ripping our family apart! It has been over a year now and we seemed to have grown a lot making changes fixing issues talking , listening to each other’s requests but there is still that bothering question that he never has an answer to , why wasent I good enough? Now everytime we’re out and see her( mutual friends of friends ) my mood comes crashing down. And all of it replays again in my head ! He wanted her and not me. I just don’t understand how I’ll ever move on if I keep having these thoughts. This has been a major issue for my self esteem and my overall mental health. I’m at my end. I just wish I could find a way to be myself again.
What are your thoughts of allowing your spouse to cheat but with rules?
Here I go again...BF of twelve years had a several-months-long EA with one woman and a shorter physical affair with another one, all during the time I was recovering from breast cancer and a broken wrist. I finally found out, he was angry I "snooped", he expressed regret and then remorse, takes responsibility for it and says it's not my fault, and continues to say he wants to stay with me,...