Infertility Support Group

In vitro fertilization is one of the most common and utilized ways of treating conception problems. This support group is dedicated to those beginning their journey with IVF and needing support. Join the community and share your experiences, advice, and story with people going through similar challenges starting a family.

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vent

deleted_user
deleted_user
It seems more and more lately that I have been "shut up" by my BF when it comes to any sort of comment/advice I give her about her sons. I realize I don't have children but, if she complains to me that her older child will not be napping anymore, and then her 6 month old will be, and how she'll be stuck in the house all day, I say "Well, maybe he can nap on the go..." and she'll say "You can't deprive children of their rest. It is unhelathy for their development when they are constantly overtired." I didn't mean EVER day...I have a freind who has 3 kids and she is always running everywhere trying to get one off to school and the other picked up. She has a 9 month old and he naps in the car on those days...

Earlier today she was complaining that her son would not nap and he was taking his clothes off and laughjing that it was funny. And I said "well, just take his clothes off then and leave him in his diaper. Then he won't think it's funny anymore." And her response "You can't reason with a 2 1/2 year old. They can't comprehend reason."

Ok. I get it. I get that I don't have kids and I guess I don't know what I am talking about. But, it's just the way she says it. Like any of my advice can't be validated because I'm childless.

Sorry, just needed to vent. I know it's stupid little things but it seems to happen more and more.
deleted_user
deleted_user
I SAY JUST DONT GIVE HER ANY ADVICE AT ALL . THAT WAY SHE DOESNT HAVE THE FUEL TO START THE FIRE.
deleted_user
deleted_user
Thanks...I actually feel bad for even saying anything about her...I know she would be crushed if she knew she hurt me. She doesn't realize she is doing it and I shouldn't make her feel like she should walk on eggshells around me. I guess I just needed to vent because there's this big open space between childless us and our friends with children. We have to go to a dinner party tomorrow and the conversation will turn to everyone talking about their children while we sit silently listening with nothing to offer...it's just such an empty feeling. Nothing to add.
deleted_user
deleted_user
I am sure your friend loves you and doesn't mean to hurt you but she is. I think you should tell her that it hurts your feelings. You don't want her to walk on eggshells around you but you should let her know that it is hard for you and you are trying to be helpful. I have had a few people make rude comments to me about not understanding since I don' thave children, but if you look at it from our side they don't understand what we are going through b/c they do have children. I am sorry that your friend is hurting you.
deleted_user
deleted_user
I wouldn't comment anymore when she says that sort of thing. If she wants to complain about her kids then just say "hmm" or "uh-huh." I think she will get the point.
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