When I get into the "Why Mes" I remind myself that there are so many people out there that has it worse than me. I do a lot of volunteer work...food pantry, homeless shelter, fundraising at school for different non profits (I am a teacher.) I find inspirational stories of people rising above to share with my students that way I am teaching them a lesson as well as reminding myself that I have a lot to be thankful for. I also surround myself with uplifting quotes...my favorite from an truly strong man...
"You can't control the cards you're dealt, just how you play the hand" --Randy Pausch

I am sorry that you are feeling this way. I don't have an answer but would love it if there were one. I am thinking about reading the book Unsung Lullabies that others have recommended. I hope you feel better tomorrow.

I forgot to say...good luck...stay strong...this is a long ride for most.

i dont think i have an advice for this but i just wanted to let you knwo that you are not alone in this one.. i feel like that and so my best friend does..it is just so frustrating.. how many iuis you tried???

This was our 6th iui. We did 2 unmedicated, 2 clomid/iui, 2 injectable iuis. It is very frustrating for me because we are unexplained so there is never an answer whu these don't work:(

Totally understand the Unexplained...I did 4 IUIs and nothing. I think everyone gets the "why me's" It all sucks. I try and think of the positive things in my life and the things that make me happy. Often I grab up a kitty for a good cuddle.

I really feel like this whole journey is much like a roller coaster ride with tons of ups and downs. For me the downs can be bad, but then I just try to focus on what is next...and pray that if there isn't a BFP that at least we are making progress. Good luck to you!

Wow, this is a good question. I don't think there is any one thing that helps. Between failed "natural" attempts, IUI and 4 IVF's I think I've tried almost everything.

What helps changes from day to day and even moment to moment. Since our 4th failed IVF I have done more reading. First I read "The Empty Picture Frame." That helped me bring a lot of what I was feeling to the surface. Now I am reading "Unsung Lullabies." That book is really helping me put labels on my feelings and grieve the way I need to.

The thing with IF is that every month we get AF and are not pregnant is a month we need to grieve the loss of so many things, not just not being pregnant yet again, but not getting pregnant the way so many others do, the loss of our dreams. Even though we may get pregnant at some point and have our family, the loss of the way we always dreamed it would be needs to be processed.

Talking here helps a lot. Like justmesherry mentioned, helping others can help too. I read daily quotes like she mentioned too. Now doing these things does not take away the pain, but they can help us process it which needs to be done or it will just sit in us building up.

I am sorry your cycle did not work and wish you the best of luck in the future.

p.s. What tests have they done between you and DH?

6 failed IUIs here. I usually give myself 1- 2 days max to grieve, cry, scream - whatever I need to do, then I pick myself up, dust myself off and start all over again.

I wish there were an easy answer...

SueMcc...like most have said here there is no one thing that does the trick. I have had eight years of failures and I will say that time has not made it any easier. For me, my faith has helped at times and at others it has not. I have been very angry at God for a while.

So what's the magic trick? I honestly don't know. I will pray for peace for you during this journey.

Its so hard, i'm very sorry for you. I went through 2 years of trying and 3 IUI's, fortunately the last worked and I have 6 month old twin boys. The pain of the why me's is still fresh for me though... my pregnancy was very very hard and my boys were born early and had to spend 6 weeks in the hospital, one of them had to have surgery, then I had to have back surgery and now we've found out my mom has a very rare, incurable cancer. There were a lot of days when it was all too much.

One thing that helps me is the book The Secret. I think we all want to be positive but dont know how or sometimes even why we should be. I found that the secret helped to focus me. I got it on audio book and would just listen to it in the car for a few minutes every day.

Good luck to you!