I love all of you ladies so much. Thank you so much for your support. I am my own worst enemy sometimes and my pride prevents me from reaching out to ohters for help. I know that is the silliest thing to do when you are in a support group. I can offer support to others but I feel as though I will be judged if I reach out for help. I feel as though I should be able to handle things on my own. I have now seen that that doens't work out very well. I kept it all in and then I exploded. I called my mom at work yesterday and explained to her where I was coming from. I told her that my feelings are still raw and that although I have good days, there are still some very bad days. It was a good conversation and I think we made some progress. It is a tough situation at times because my DH and I are living with my parents as we renovate our house. This makes it hard to get away from the family at times. I really believe that this life test has a purpose. I just have to take it one day at a time. I think the approaching due date and my approaching IVF cycle have added stress that I wasn't willing to acknowledge. I want this next cycle to work so badly and I am afriad of how I will react if it is a failure. I am nervous, scared, sad, happy and excited all at the same time. Thank God for all of you women. I couldn't do it without you. I need to remember that I not a bad person and I am not a pain if I post questions all the time. One of my friends on here had suggested that I pray for my brother and his GF. I am going to try that and I will let you know how it goes. I promise you all that I will love my niece or nephew with all my heart. I trully do not want any harm to befall my brother, the baby or his gf. I am just hurting right now and need some space from the situation. Thank you all again for your advice. You really helped me alot!!
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