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Sorry guys I need to vent about this...My husband finally came home from his business trip this weekend just to turn around and go back out. He was home for 3 days and I think I seen him a total of 6 hours. I miss him so much. He was so tired and not feeling well that he was a sleep before I got to bed every night Now how am I going to make a baby when my husband is so tired he can not do his part?
And about the BABY THING!!!! I can not get baby off my mind I am hurting so much to have a baby of my own.. Why can I not have a baby? Going to that ultrasound with my friend the other day was so hard for me All I could do when I was watching her son on the screen was to think Im never going to see my own baby on that screen. Im never going to have to do this Then I would start thinking that my mom is not going to be there to hold my hand or come with me to Dr. appointments or be at my shower or anything GOD Im crying now I have a Dr. appointment on July 3rd that is when our Insurance kicks in I know what she is going to say Lets get some weight off you and get your sugars under control and then we can talk about getting you prego. I dont want to wait I want a baby now!!! I know what some of you are going to say Get yourself it to shape before you have a baby to give the baby a better chance I know this in my mind but my heart is braking into a million pieces every time I see a mother and a child I dont know how much more I can take of this! My sister in-law is prego and all she could talk about this weekend is how she is so happy and that how God blesses good people with kids and that is why her and my brother-in-law have been blessed with 3 kids because they walk the way of the Lord. So in other words my husband and I dont because we dont have kids and with the way Im feeling today we never will. As a cruel joke for above I started my period this weekend to so it was like an extra little HAHAHAHA YOUR NEVER GOING TO HAVE A BABY!!!!
Im so depressed right now and I know I am because Im tired all the time, I dont want to talk to anyone, I have stopped doing things that I loved to do and all I want to do is go to bed and sleep. My husband is gone, I have no kids, All my friends have lives so they dont have time to sit and deal with my crap!!!! Im so alone! The only comfort I have is sleep and foodIm never going to be able to lose what I want to it is way to hard and I just dont have the will power to do it!
And about the BABY THING!!!! I can not get baby off my mind I am hurting so much to have a baby of my own.. Why can I not have a baby? Going to that ultrasound with my friend the other day was so hard for me All I could do when I was watching her son on the screen was to think Im never going to see my own baby on that screen. Im never going to have to do this Then I would start thinking that my mom is not going to be there to hold my hand or come with me to Dr. appointments or be at my shower or anything GOD Im crying now I have a Dr. appointment on July 3rd that is when our Insurance kicks in I know what she is going to say Lets get some weight off you and get your sugars under control and then we can talk about getting you prego. I dont want to wait I want a baby now!!! I know what some of you are going to say Get yourself it to shape before you have a baby to give the baby a better chance I know this in my mind but my heart is braking into a million pieces every time I see a mother and a child I dont know how much more I can take of this! My sister in-law is prego and all she could talk about this weekend is how she is so happy and that how God blesses good people with kids and that is why her and my brother-in-law have been blessed with 3 kids because they walk the way of the Lord. So in other words my husband and I dont because we dont have kids and with the way Im feeling today we never will. As a cruel joke for above I started my period this weekend to so it was like an extra little HAHAHAHA YOUR NEVER GOING TO HAVE A BABY!!!!
Im so depressed right now and I know I am because Im tired all the time, I dont want to talk to anyone, I have stopped doing things that I loved to do and all I want to do is go to bed and sleep. My husband is gone, I have no kids, All my friends have lives so they dont have time to sit and deal with my crap!!!! Im so alone! The only comfort I have is sleep and foodIm never going to be able to lose what I want to it is way to hard and I just dont have the will power to do it!
deleted_user
I am so sorry girl that you are having such a bad time. Im overweight and just hate when ppl say that because its not easy to lose it . That is what my doctors told me too . If they pay for a lapban surgery im more than willing to do it. lol You shouldnt give up though . I know its hard but just keep your head up . You have many friends here you dont even have to go out to see. We all love ya and good luck .
deleted_user
I am so sorry. I know how you feel. I am worried about my husband not being around to "do his part", I am tired of the skinny nurses telling me to loose weight, I am depressed when my sister-in-law pops out another baby and I don't have any friends that can spend time with me b/c they are all busy taking care of their families. I highly recommend you get yourself to a therapist. You are not alone...there are a lot of women reading what you wrote and we can identify with how you feel. Keep writing.
deleted_user
Oh honey, so sorry you are so sad. I agree that a therapist and maybe some meds 9both have helped me immensely) would help. Maybe just try walking 15 minutes a day or find a walking buddy. You could post a free ad on craigslist to find a walking buddy. It is hard at first, but now I have to exercise to keep myself sane, but take baby steps. Hang in there.
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I have been here before, a long long time ago and now I am back.Forgive me for not just saying what I want to say,even under a triple dose of antidepressants it is still raw and seeping and I am hesitant at revealing it as at least under the bandages around my heart I don,t have to look at how raw and wounded.My child was cleaved from my heart by his own actions. my child of ten,turning eleven...
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I gave my 2 week notice last Friday 13th. Now to join you fine people in a life of leisure and nothing else to do but to look out for myself....is it just me or does that sound pretty boring? My goal was to live to retire and I guess having to take early retirement because of health reasons wasn't exactly the way I had planned things. I just can't stay in that building that is reeking mildew...
