I am 13 days away from my 41st birthday, and I'm struggling, I just can't come to grips with the knowledge that I will never bear a child. I cry every day now, I just can't help it. I'm overcome with self-loathing, and I feel like this is a punishment from God. When I see those "Feed The Children" commercials, I can't help thinking God feels it's better for a child to be born into squalor and sickness than to be born to me. My husband's sister has 4 children, and she rubs my nose in it every chance she gets. The pain I already feel is heartrending, without her pouring salt in the wound. I just don't know how to get past this.
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