Infertility Support Group

In vitro fertilization is one of the most common and utilized ways of treating conception problems. This support group is dedicated to those beginning their journey with IVF and needing support. Join the community and share your experiences, advice, and story with people going through similar challenges starting a family.

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I give up!

deleted_user
deleted_user
Girls-after such a long time looking for every alternative under the sun to try and avoid coming to terms that our only hope is IVF. I guess i have been in denial (maybe that's normal) but of course the $$ is the bigest factor. My ins pays for IVF somewhat with a lifetime max of $15,000 which includes all fertility procedures. So do the math, we have 1 shot. ANyway, today at this point we are going for it! But instead of feeling excited and hopeful, I feel defeated. ANyone else that has made the IVF plunge feel this way? If so, why do you think. Like to hear what everyone's feeling is on this major decision.
deleted_user
deleted_user
When we decided to do IVF we were sort of happy/sad. We were happy because we hoped it would work but sad because we were having to resort to the big guns (and it was expensive!)...our last choice/chance. Good luck, I know it isn't easy!
deleted_user
deleted_user
It only takes one! I know it's hard but try and stay positive and hopeful! IVF isn't that bad...we felt like it was our best chance. Our doctor always says "the unknown is the scariest part."
deleted_user
deleted_user
When we were told that IVF was our only option I cried for days. Now that we have actually started the process it is not as bad. I am not saying it is not hard because it is, but at least now I can see the light at the end of the tunnel. I have many fears, stress and emotions that I am having to deal with because the problem lies with my husband and not with me I am trying to be the strong one so I can help him in every way!
deleted_user
deleted_user
I have known from a very young age that IVF would more than likely be my only option. So I had accepted it, but still felt defeated many times over the years. I always wished I would have a "miracle" and get pregnant the old fashion way.
I wish you the very best of luck as you move forward with IVF.
deleted_user
deleted_user
Also, you may have more than one try. The IVF costs you are quoted are BEFORE insurance discounts. The insurance company will have seriously negotiated lower prices with your provider.

I have a friend that was shocked to find that they could actually do 3 FRESH IVF and 2 FET with a $20K lifetime max.

So, maybe there is hope for you as well. OF course, IVF does have higher odds of pregnancy than IUI's.
deleted_user
deleted_user
I agree with the light at the end of the tunnel. Like you, we only have 1 shot as far as insurance paying for it goes. But if it doesn't work, we'll try again on our own. I read a lot of women talk about the cost factor, but at the same time I don't get how it's different from investing money into other things- like a car? I know it doesn't seem fair that we should have to pay for something that should be given to us free by nature, but in the end it is what it is. Don't be discouraged! Once you get started, things aren't as bad. I felt better once we did, I felt like I had a purpose again.
deleted_user
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Being 38, I was happy when my RE said IVF. We had done 2 IUIs, which I was not confident would work. I had already come to terms that we would have to do IVF. Earlier on when we started IUIs it was harder, as I was not prepared. Good luck!
deleted_user
deleted_user
i know exactly how you feel, when we started this journey 14 months ago when i had my tubal reversal i never thought it would come to this.i am on my last IUI and will find out if it worked on friday.my ins will pay for only one IVF also but at my age we will have to try donor eggs.ins does not cover any of her costs for meds and treatment.and to top it off my RE office has a waiting list 6-8 months long for a doner.they have offered to find one through an outside agency for an additional 5 grand.not very happy with them right now.
deleted_user
deleted_user
We felt the same way at first. Kind of like we were reluctantly going to IVF, but then after we started and figured out the $$ we relaxed and got excited.
deleted_user
deleted_user
Hi girls-thanks for all your responses. Nelle- i actually pointed out to DH how much $ we recently spent finishing our basement (i am embarrased to say how much) and our plans to re-do the kitchen, we all know how much that costs. And about 4 years ago how much we paid the vet when our dear dog was diagnosed with cancer. DH is much more reluctant to spend the money then me, which adds a whole new level of stress. Guess that is why I feel defeated. But all you kind words today have made me feel better. Baby dust to one and all!!!
deleted_user
deleted_user
IVF is very expensive and I was hoping that we wouldn't have to resort to that, but after my last miscarriage I've decided it's our best option. I feel defeated as well. I'm really worried that it won't work and we have spent all this money. My insurance doesn't cover any of it. Good Luck.
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