I have got so many mixed emotions at the moment, on one hand I feel so happy and excited about fostering, but then on the other hand, although i am really happy for all getting their BFP's, I feel left behind. The fostering is forging ahead, we have now had 2 visits from the social worker who can see no problems, the referees have had their letters, and we have got our medicals tonight. If all goes to plan, we should have our first foster child by Easter at the latest. So everything there is going great. But then I think about what we have given up on. I want to be pregnant. I want to have the morning sickness. The swollen ankles. The feeling of not being able to get comfortable because babys feet are up in my ribs. Dont get me wrong on this one, I love hearing of everyone getting their BFP's, their feelings when they have just given birth, the overwhelming emotions when they get their happy news, but I am so damn jealous. Although its our choice that we are not doing anymore treatments and moving onto fostering which I still feel is right for us, I just feel left behind
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