It's hard for me to say, really. I can imagine how it feels, but I think it really depends on you and your relationship with your coworkers. It sounds like all of them are just hoping for you to experience motherhood, but I'm sure they don't realize that you've been trying and are having trouble. It might not be the most tactful question, but at least it is well-intentioned. Perhaps you could just say something like, "yes, we're trying", or "we're working on it". If you know them well, you might even want to let them konw that you're having trouble "we've been trying for a while; it's very hard to talk about." That lets them know to back off.

Or you may just want to keep it all to yourself and say something noncommittal like "we're considering it."

Good luck. It must be frustrating.

I have to agree with Susan. I don't think they mean any harm. Best wishes, and God Bless.

I can't stand that question. There should be some kind of bulletin that should go out to everyone saying never ever ask that question unless you know the answer. I feel awful when I get that question even though deep down I know that they are just being nosey and are not trying to be hurtful. I am a very open person and at first was concealing the fact that we were ttc from co-workers but it is just a big part of my life now and I don't thnk I should have to keep a secret so I have been telling a few people here and there which has made work so much better. I don't get that annoying question anymore and when I am having a rough day I can go to those who know what is going on to vent or cry even if they don't really understand what I am going through I don' t have to put a smile on my face with them when I am having one of those days when I just can't. Of course I trust these co-workers and now they won't share my personal life with others. For the people you aren't close with at work they shouldn't be asking you about your personal business anyway and I wouldn't even answer them if I were you. They don't need to know anything.

My co-workers know everything, i also work for a mostly man based office and they are all clued in to what will be happening to me when i start my cycle. i have been with the company for over 8 years now and are quite friendly with them all...it would have been so much more difficult if i had to keep this all from them, they slip up now and then but most of the time they are mucn more considerate when spouting off, i personally do think it helps but you have to feel comfortable with the people around you... only you can answer this question.. we are always here to help you vent...best wishes..

I completely agree! I mean, I know that they are not trying to be hurtful but there are some days when I just want to scream "sorry, it just isn't that easy for all of us!"

I just usually go with it'll happen when we're ready.

Well, everyone at work knows my situation b/c it helps to vent and reach out for support. My supervisor and a coworker my age are both pregnant (unplanned too)and people at work ask me how I deal with seeing them progress. I do the best I can. What bothers me about my coworkers is this: some of the religious ones tell me all I need is faith and patience, and some just say stop the treatments and I'll get pregnant. Well, I've been ttc for almost two years, all prayers unanswered and my body won't ovulate unless I force it to with Clomid and gonadotropins. Have you thought about opening up to your coworkers, maybe saying that you do want children and have been ttc with no luck?

I know exactly what you mean! I have only told one friend at work and I don't plan to tell anyone else with the exception of my boss if the appointments get to be too much. It is frustrating and sometimes it is that much more frustrating b/c you know they aren't saying it to be mean but b/c they don't know that anything is wrong...either way it is still hard. Depending on who it is I either try to blow it off with something like "with all the weekends that I work around here I don't know if I will ever have time for kids" or just laugh and say "practicing is much more fun".

I know that it is hard but hang in there L-)

Lol! I am around the same age as you and I get that all the time at work. My boss has been asking me on and off for 4 years if we are going to have kids. I finally told him about the IVF thing and you should have seen the look on his face.

I keep it no secret that we are ttc. It has made it so much easier on me and my coworkers. They know my cycle and know when I take my Clomid and know that I may be a little short with people during that time. Also by letting people know, I have found a fantastic support system in being able to share with people. For the first year we were ttc we didn't tell many people. As more people found out I was amazed at how many people were going through and had gone through the same situation. It makes me angry at myself that I spent a year feeling so alone like I was the only one when there are so many people who go through the exact same things. Telling people was the best thing I did in this situation. Now when people ask when we are going to have kids (which happens a lot more with my sis-in-law PG with a honeymoon baby) I tell them flat out, "Actually, we've been trying for over two years". More than anything I hope that they will think twice about asking someone else that most insensitive question.