I am new here and I am here because I have been ttc #2 since April 2007. I went on clomid and got pregnant with twins in April of 2009. They implanted on my cesarean scar tissue and therefore I was forced to terminate the pregnancy. One baby was taken by D&C and the other was terminated through injections. It was a very difficult time. They were wonderful healthy babies, they made it to 8 weeks with strong heartbeats. Right after that, I lost an ovary and a 7 lb cyst. I find myself slipping into a depression that I fear I will never recover from. I just want a sibling for my little son Jack. My heart is broken and I feel that I am the worst mom ever. I come from a very large family and they tell me just to stop trying and get over it. Move on with life. THIS IS MY LIFE RIGHT NOW. I have PCOS and that is why we are not able to conceive. I am looking for a support group because I am driving myself insane. I can have my period and think, oh there is still a chance I could be pregnant or even if I take a pregnancy test (which I do every day--OCD--) I think well it's too early or it just is a bad test. I can never give myself a break, a time to regroup. The only way I can stop this is if i completely abstain (and that doesn't get anybody pregnant). Any help or advice would be much appreciated. I am suppose to see the doctor about this, but I feel they will have nothing to say that will help me. My OB/GYN doesn't want to put me on clomid again till after October cause he thinks that is whats best for me. I don't want to wait any longer, my heart hurts now. I hate that my doctor can control my life.
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