I'm in so much emotional pain. Besides struggling with lack of a sex drive (seeing the doctor next week to address this along with other issues), I'm struggling with the lack of conceiving. We had our son 7 years ago, and we tried for around 14 months when he was around 9 months old to get pregnant again with no luck. I saw the OB/GYN and he said I had PCOS. Well, the classic symptoms that most with PCOS have, well, I've never been checked for cysts on my ovaries, and as far as insulin resistance, I don't believe that is a problem either. I believe I got the diagnoses primarily on the fact that I was having trouble conceiving. I'm going to question my current doctor about the whole thing as well. We've had unprotected sex for around six months or so, now, and nothing. I've had very irregular cycles. I had a gastric bypass almost two months ago and had some bleeding shortly after that when the estrogen stored in the fat was released, and that's the last sign of a period I've had. The doctor who diagnosed the PCOS said with a significant weight loss my fertility would likely jump start. Well, I've lost around 160 pounds (granted I have a good 60 pounds, at least, to get near a normal weight). To get to my pre-pregnancy weight, I'd have around 35 pounds to go. And he told me I needed to have a significant weight loss at that weight, which means I have a long way to go. But it kills me to see someone of a similar weight and age (I'm 30) walk around pregnant, and then we struggle to get pregnant and nothing ever happens. I can't afford fertility treatment, so that's out of the question, but the emotional pain is so very deep for me. I feel so inadequate as a wife. And I have a deep void that I can't seem to fill no matter what I try to do. I should be grateful that I have our son, but even he took me 3 years to conceive. All this to say that I guess I'm looking for others that maybe can relate. Cuz my husband isn't getting how deep my pain is over this. How inadequate I feel. How much of a failure I feel right now. I tried to talk to him and he just doesn't get it and it's killing me cuz I feel so very very alone. Sorry to drone on and on. I'm hurting so much over this whole thing I guess.
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