I just about survived the visit to my parents although I felt very anxious on the train and for two pins would have jumped off and hit the shops instead. I took plenty of money with me in case the family wanted to do lunch, I don't know why, cos they never do. I sometimes wonder how I can be part of the same family, we are so different. I love art and cinema, music and theatre, but they seem content with very loud bad telly all the time, and it's not just my mum and dad, the whole family seem the same. So I just sat there for the afternoon trying to get the family news over the noise of horse racing from leopardstown or Kempton Park. Anyway I survived, in tact, even gave my old dad a big cuddle before I left. He really is not a threat to me anymore..The harm now is form me beating myself up with poor self image and self worth. Which is silly, as it is clear to see my world is a much larger one than that of my family's. I should give myself a break and be thankful for the world I have now.
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