
Incest Survivors Community Group
This group was created before there was an actual support group on this site for incest survivors. Most people are already comfortable here, feel free to add your thoughts, questions, and opinions. I'm here for anyone that needs me. -metalheadlxlxl

deleted_user
I know yesterday was Mother's Day in all but I just couldn't bring myself to tell my MOTHER happy mothers day. Insted I told my grandmother happy mothers day. I couldn't tell her that, after all she has done. What does she expect me to do, forget that this has all happened? I know I need to forgive my mom AND dad but HOW? I can forget them but I don't know about forgive. Should I email her(I cut contact but she is emailing everybody I Know checking up on me like I'm some kind of criminal, she keeps telling them that if I keep all of my emotions inside me that will do harm to e in the end)They tell her that I don't keep all of my emotions bottled up just somethings. And they wouldn't allow anything like that to happen to me. What do I do? I am so confused and just knowing that I didn't say anything to my mom yesterday probably does kill her inside but she doesn't know how I feel, she wont listen. Will this affect me in some way that I will regret that all this has happened and everything be blamed on me again? Should I be feeling guilty?
Can anynone help me out please, I would greatly appreciate it.
Can anynone help me out please, I would greatly appreciate it.
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I think it all depends on where you are in your healing. I'm way too enraged at this time to have contact. Of course, my family is so dysfunctional that some respect it and some don't. It's all about you. If you can focus on what is best for you, and not worry about who is saying what, that would be the best. Easier said than done though.
I didn't send my mom a thing. I won't this year, either. If she can't forgive me one day (after I've forgiven her) for not sending a card or wishing her a happy mother's day one year, I can handle it. I've survived sexual abuse.
My cousin dad at 20 in a tragic car accident(mind you I have 13 other cousins who 9 of them have children as well. Ever since then she hasnt been right she talks about her constantly and thought she got a text message from her and bought an expensive grave blanket saying she was cold. Im sure this has something to do with it, but now I dont even want to talk to her. I feel like she betrayed my trust. So I know how you feel.
You can get a million replies of advice to give you options, but inevitably it is up to you to make the decision. If you think you could handle any response she is going to give you or feel it will give you closure than go ahead, but if you think something can come from this that makes you feel worse. I would save yourself the heartache and let go. No one can hurt you(emotionally and verbally)anymore unless you put yourself out there and let them. Hope this helped at least a little.
Krys
take care