I was in shock! I sat on the table and stared out into the window. Never dropping a tear just sitting there looking out the window and watching my life pass by. So many thoughts and emotions but yet I could not bring myself to cry. I dont think even though it has been a year that I have truly cried. I feel if I break down that I am pitying myself and admitting I am weak. And with all the blows that my life had been dealt before that moment I added the news as another challenge that I have to prepare for. The only feeling that I know surfaced that day was shame. What was your initial reaction that day to hearing your diagnosis?
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