Frusturation and sadness are not even close to what I'm feeling like right now. The last 4 weeks have been the most intense weeks ever, I was admitted to the hospital for 3 days to have my left armpit drained, it had gotten so bad that it spread to my upper arm and it looked like i had a ball underneath the meaty part of my arm. Though the surgery and hospital stay went as well as it could have been, i still had to miss work and i was out of work for almost 2 weeks because of it. Last week new abscess came about, and one was in the same armpit! Thankfully it was of "normal" size and did not grow anywhere as big as the last one. My biggest frustration is the doctors, the hospital doctors suggested that I go to the wound care doctors, who broke my spirit by basically telling me I was a hopeless cause and I should just go to the plastic surgeon and accept the fact that there was nothing else I could do to treat it. My general doctor (who I have only met once before) told me that I was overweight (no shit), and I should lose weight but still get the surgery, and the surgeon who did my drainage I just met with today and she basically called me fat and said that I should go to a derm for long term meds. What I don't understand is why I put myself through all this, I'm paying these people to tell me something I already know. I'm very much aware I'm overweight and even though I have been losing weight these last months, no one seems to remember that I have had this NIGHTMARE CONDITION since i was young - before I could have been categorized as overweight. I've also done the antibiotics and yea there okay for awhile but we all know they are short term cures, and the surgeries just scare me. I don't know what to do now, I feel like I've already done it all. I manage pretty well most days, but when doctors get involved it makes me question everything and hate this condition more instead of just tolerating it like I usually do.
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