As you know I havent started tx yet, but imagine I will be in the same situation. My daughter is 4 and my sons are 3 yrs and 3 months. I am interested in seeing how other people cope.

OH SWEETHEART,I CAN TELL YOU ARE AN ABSOLUTLY WONDERFUL MOTHER,GOD BLESS YOU SO MUCH!!!MY HEART JUST GOES OUT TO YOU AND YOUR CHILDREN.WISH I KNEW WHAT TO SAY AS MINE ARE ALL GROWN BUT I DO WATCH MY 2 YR.OLD GRANDSON AND THAT GETS DIFFICULT.KNOW I COULDNT WATCH ANOTHER CHILD.WE DO WELL. THINK YOU ARE RIGHT ABOUT UNRESOLVED FEELINGS ABOUT GRANDMA,THEY ARE AFRAID THEY ARE GOING TO LOSE YOU NOW.THEY WERE FORTUNATE TO HAVE HAD A GRANDMA TO LOVE.I WILL PRAY FOR YOU ALL.KEEP REASSURING THEM YOU WILL BE ALRIGHT.TAKE IT EASY,IT WILL ALL WORK OUT.PRAYERS AND HUGS,VJI

Well when I get tired and to the end of my rope..I just lock my kids outside... but my kids are dogs. I just wanted to respond as your post moved me so very much. You have been through so much and I can tell by how you phrased your post,that you are wonderful and caring mother. I am so sorry that you and your children have to go through this. Perhaps you could talk to your pediatrician and get a referral for a family councilor. My mother was in and out of the hospital for about a year when I was 5 or 6, I only remember a little bit about that time..it probably was difficult at the time, but it did not scar me for life. I only remember now what a wonderful mother I had through all of my childhood. You are half through this treatment, it won't be much longer and things will be so much better..but maybe a professional can help. Is there a childrens hospital in your area? I know you and your family are coping with so much..but hang in there. Happy Mothers Day...you sound like the best Mom just doing the best she can. Hugs Jeannie

Yes, I agree with every one else, you are a wonderful mother. It is great you have told your daughter she can talk to others too. I know that helped my daughter when I was really sick years ago, just to have another person reassure her was what she needed. You seem to be doing all the right things, spending lots of one on one time with them. We use to take Saturdays, and my husband and I would spend time with just one child...and then we had lots of family time too. I found when my daughter would act up, it was usually becasue she needed the extra attention for what ever reason. You see, she wanted attention, and it did not matter if it was positive or negative...as long as she got it. Once we figured that out, we would know to spend extra time with her, or read an extra book, or just do whatever. Each child is so different, you figure that out as you go. You sound like you have explained things very well to your daughter and son...as much as they can understand. Why don't you make up a special calendar with fun things to do down the road...that would also be a tracking device for your tx to be done and over. It is a tangible thing when they can see in on a calendar...and then make special plans, or do fun arts and crafts on certain days....they will learn the concept of time passing, and maybe understand this is not a life sentence.....and they can be part of the big "countdown". I always found the art of distraction was always the best way to change a behavior. If they are suppose to pick up thier toys and they are not doing it, I would take them to the stack of toys, and help their little hands pick something up, then walk with them to the toy box, then really get excited, and tell them thank you for helping me clean up....I mean really, they would run to get the next toy as they loved all the excitement and praise when they did such a simple thing. It must be difficult when they are fussing, and you don't feel very good either. I am not sure how much help you have access to, but if you have friends and relatives who can take the kids for special days, and give your self a day of complete rest without having to answer to mommy. Then you will be refreshed, and ready to go at it again when they get back home....LIke Csick said, in the moment it may seem overwhelming, but in the bigger picture and when they are older, they will barely remember this time, especially you littlest one. You hang in there. You are doing all the right things, and September will be here befor you know it!
Take Care,
5starr

first of all thank you for starting this post...i was thinking about this issue yesterday but didn't do anything about it. i am not on tx, but my husb is. we have three kids, a boy 7, a girl about to turn 5 in 2 wks and another boy 3. my husb was laid off in sept and started the tx dec 28th. my oldest son's teacher just approached me this wk and told us he is even more distracted than usual, turns in all his papers without doing anything on them, when they are spose to be working he just daydreams, etc... to add to all of this my grandmother just passed away 3 wks ago and they were very close. i try to make up for everything my husb can't do but it's impossible. i've tried to get my son to talk about it but he acts like it's all normal which i guess this is their normal now. it's breaking my heart to watch how this has changed and affected each of my kids. i don't have any answers for you i can only say i can relate. i just try to keep telling myself that trials and pain work compassion and character in us and my kids have a lot of compassion. God can and will bring good out of this, doesn't mean it is easy. i'm available if you ever need or want to chat.

Oh sweetie, you are a wonderful, wonderful mommy! Your kids will be just fine because they have your love and that will carry them through this. You are doing all the right things...but please also try to arrange for time for yourself so you don't have to be mommy 24/7 - and I mean that only in the sense that you need some down time to heal. I agree with 5starr's suggestion of a countdown like a huge calendar or something that they can visualize. They could mark each week off that you've taken your treatment with a special crayon or marker and then there will be a prize at the end. Make a game of it...sort of. The more participation they have in this the less they will have to be scared of. Here's a big hug for you and your little ones! Mary

I am not on tx, but this is my story. I am in the acute phase of HCV and my body is sporadically clearing the virus and I have been very sick since Feb 08. As soon as I took sick my 2 yr old wouldn't sleep in his bed anymore and will only sleep with me and he has become very clingy. I can see the toll this is taking on him. He is acting out and I try my best everyday to keep things as normal as possible for him cuz I am afraid it may scar him and thats the last thing I want. I do not have the energy to do the things I normally do with my kids and it is affecting all of us. I am a single mom and it sucks. I have been getting short with my kids and I never use to. I feel so bad but I know this to shall pass so I do what I can I love them as much as I can I give them extra hugs and kisses and I pray to God to watch over us. May God Bless you and your family too sweetie and Happy Mothers Day :D

My heart really goes out to you. My kids are grown and out on their own. Thank God. Cause I really don't know how I'd handle it if they weren't. I really liked what Jeannie and 5starr had to say. The calender sounds like a great idea. My prayers are with you and your family. God bless and keep you all... Teri

Communication, openness and inclusion should be helpful.

Get them talking. Get them asking questions. Answer all the questions openly and honestly. not knowing or misunderstanding can cause horrible problems.

Include them in all ways appropriate.

if they know what's going on and understand a bit about it on their individual levels, they will be more secure and will be able to help YOU and also return to their normal everyday ways.

Thank you so much everyone with your responses. All of you had great ideas that I will be trying! The calendar thing would be a great idea especially, because I've done that with things when my daughter is anxious for (like Christmas & birthday), it never occured to me to do it with my treatment. I did think about the therapy for my daughter, I took her when her grandma died but the therapist said there wasn't anything they could do to help because she was reacting in a healthy way. I talked to her about how she would feel about seeing a special doctor, like mommy does, to talk about the things that bother her and she said she'd rather talk to mommy. I think if she gets any worse I'll probably look into therapy for her. I saw in my treatment doctor's office on their special "medical" channel how there was a children's support group for children whose parent was on chemo from cancer (but it's not in my area). I wish there was something like that here for kids whose parents have HCV.

And thank you for all of you for sharing that you are struggeling with this very thing. It helps so know I'm not alone and lets me know my kids are acting "normally" to the situation and that it's the situation causing it and not me. Big hugs to everyone!

I am so self centered, I actualy consider my self anti social just so I do not have to be there for anyone but my self. I keep my life so empty and simple so I do not have to feel. My emotions overwelm me because I am so imature emotionaly. I do not take the time to do anything for any one but myself. Just think what if all your chidren had was me. Think how lucky they are they have you and not someone like me. I am trying to make you feel less guilt but I think what you realy need is some help....

This is a very important post dear...my heart so goes out to you..as you know I'm at same point in tx as you. But my kids are 25 and 27 so I can't even imagine...you sound like a truly wonderful mother dear and I so wish I could give you advise..

Can just say I hope others here on DS w/kids can give you wonderful advice...

I can just be here to let ya kow I luv ya and will be here w/big should should you need it dear!

xoxo

My oldest child is 17 ~ I have 5~ and at week 10 , he begged and pleaded for me to quit treatment. Basically I told him no and explained at his age level,,, that I either do treatment and hope to slay this beast or I sit here and continue to "rot" . I was extreamly sick also before tx started and have since cleared ..woo hoooo!... stay strong .. my 8 year old daughter understands the concept of "slaying the dragon" but that slaying, only means sleeping ... she understands how important it is for me to make the dragon sleep . AND she is ok with that. Dragon collecting and fantasy runs thick in the minds of all my kids .. and me lol.

The problem I had and you and many others have is these kids realize we are on tx to get better then they watch us go through hell and try to help . they are helpless and they feel it . IT IS hard on them ....... I hope I never have to do tx again but I will if I need too . for my kids ... and now they finally understand it . Good luck with your tx , whats left of it ... and kick that dragons ass.
Tami

Oh, another great idea I did when my kids were younger, and I went through alot of surgeries. I made up a "Chore Game" I would write down simple things the kids could do to help around the house, like shaking the bathroom rug, empting the trash, vaccum fam room, etc etc. Then I would put all of those things in a bowl and they would take turns pulling out the chores. I mean they just loved that game, they would even try to trade and say they wanted to shake the rug or whatever. When the game was over, and the chores were done, then we would do something special, or go for a simple icecream or what ever I could do at that time. It helped me to get things done around the house, and gave them a real sense of responsibility and accomplishment all wrapped around FUN. They would be so proud to tell their dad what they did. Eventually they figured that game out LOL...but it did work for quite a while. I kept it up even after I was well. If we got the house stuff done, we could go to the beach, or a movie, or sometimes I would rent all of the Rocky movies and we would do a move marathon-those times were great when it was very hot outside, and I did not want the kids out in the heat. Anyway...I am always full of ideas..sorry if I over share here. Oh my daughter does something similar, she calls them Cinderalla Saturdays, and when her two girls get their chores done-then they get to dress up in what ever they want and go out to lunch or to get ice cream or go shop for something.What is funny is the one daughter is totally primm and proper and dresses to the tee, while her other daughter may want to wear a ballerina costume with two differnt socks on and bunny slippers! Anyway...you are a great mom, and this time will pass quickly. Keep up as much one on one time as you can also...even if it is just to read a book with them. Oh, I take my granddauthers to the dollar store too-just for fun. I give them 5 or 10 dollars, and let them shop for what ever they want...a really fun place and they really love getting to pick stuff out themselves. A good reward for after the chore game.
Okay, really I am done with my ideas for now LOL!
5starr

I think Im haveing an opposite problem with my daughter.. I remember her asking me about 4 years ago, if I was gonna die over this disease, and I said, people can die from Nutra sweet ya know? She was about 13, and I thought she could understand by knowing that the government scares us, and that we all will die from some thing. Shes into the big brother thing. I have noticed her pulling back away from me for a long time, since the conversations we have had about this disease. Shes alot like me, she protects herself from pain, or the unknown etc. I think shes backing off, becuse shes scared shes going to loose me. She knows that my treatment was stopped becuz of bad sides, and the more I think about it, the more it seems to be possible. Shes just pulled back, and we use to be so close.

I know teens start dislikeing their parents at this age, but I feel its somewhat about this issue. We were always lovey touchy etc. Not any longer.

Has anyone else had a problem with a teen child??? Please share with me, cuz Im sccared for her..

I dont know how you ladys do this tx with young children, I admire your strength!! God bless you all..