Healthy Sex Support Group

This community is dedicated to an open discussion about healthy sex and sharing thoughts and feelings about sexuality and improving one's sex life. Most active adults desire to have an active and fulfilling sex life, both for themselves and also their partner. Here we discuss common sexual challenges faced by both men and women.

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wife losing drive

deleted_user
deleted_user
Since having kids my wife has all but lost her sexual drive. We have 2 boys 5 years and almost 10 months. She is a stay home mom. I help out as much as I can with the house, the boys, dinner, cleaning, clothes, etc.......And I understand she will be tired doing what she does, but I feel she is forgetting about me and my needs. I love her to death and would do anything for her, but she makes it hard from time to time. Our sex now is MAYBE 1-2 times a month, and to be honest it is not the most exotic, erotic type sex. I do not know what to do, she is already on zoloft. And everytime I try to talk to her about it, it turns into a fight and she makes it out to be my fault. Which is another question, ladies, in school do they pull you out of class and teach you how to do that? lol
deleted_user
deleted_user
there's your answer right there
depression plus the drugs. its called postpartum depression or the baby blues i had it for a really long time after pregnancies..
you my friend are gonna have to get by with your hand for a while...
you can still have sex when she's in the mood but don't push it and don't complain at her the guilt will make her feel worse and you said it you'll have a fight.
remember to tell her how much you love her all the time buy her flowers court her all over again...
it will take time but you will get your sexgoddess back eventually.. :)
deleted_user
deleted_user
Well lets see, its been like this for over 5 years.
koolman
koolman
Get in touch with her EMOTIONS. Try to understand what she's going through. Go through it together. It ain't all about you, but I realize a marriage is "give-and-take", and when you're not getting what YOU want, it's unfulfilling and unhappy. When you two are communicating well EMOTIONALLY, hopefully the sex furnace will warm up again. But, let's face it, kids and responsibilities kill sex drive. Even though she's not working, it is tiring taking care of two kids.
koolman
koolman
P.S.: I went through a similar situation with a Vietnamese woman I was dating. She worked 11 hours a day 6-7 days a week at her family's nail salon, and on her one day off, all she wanted to do was sleep (which was understandable)! So, suffice to say, any intimacy we shared was brief and lukewarm. She was content, I was unhappy, so, after 11 months of dating, I broke up with her (she was relieved--I was yet one more demanding person in her life).
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